Fight the Fondant

New Blog!

2010-08-09T22:46:00.000-07:00

Hey, folks! Guess what....I have a new blog! As much as I love this blog and found it really was a wonderful project to work on while I was planning our wedding, I realized once the wedding was over that there wasn't that much left for me to say.

I may still post little tidbits here from time to time, like if I'm helping a friend with his/her wedding and feel like they have a unique vendor or project to share, but the bulk of my blogging will likely take place here from now on:

candiceeley.wordpress.com

Come by and check it out sometime -- it will be photography focused, with a healthy dose of travel and food/bar stuff thrown in. Pretty much no wedding stuff though, if that's your bag. Unless I take photos at a friend's wedding. Which could happen. Just sayin'.

Thanks for reading!

Etsy Love: Gift Giving

2010-03-16T17:57:00.001-07:00

I know...I've been a bad blogger. Truthfully, I didn't have much motivation to do wedding blogging after the wedding was over, but a couple of things happened in the last couple of weeks to make me break out the Blogger pages:

1. A very lovely couple contacted me to find out if I was interested in selling the many jars I had collected from our centerpieces because they, too, would like to do something similar. It was awesome both to get rid of the jars that had been taking up space in my house and hear that local brides were actually reading my blog and even finding it helpful.

2. Not too long after that, we discovered that a slow water leak under our house had been basically turning our house into a sauna, which led to extensive mold damage to a lot of items we were storing in our guest room, and a lot of those were wedding items. By wedding shoes (which I did plan to wear again) were totally ruined. Our cute little card tree went in the trash. But the most upsetting? My gown has mold damage. Yup, you heard me. I am going to take it to a preservation/cleaner for a consult to see if they can save it.

So, with so many of our little momentos thrown out in the trash this weekend, I wanted to revisit some of the things that made our wedding, in our opinions, awesome.

Let's start by wrapping up the Etsy Love category with attendant gifts.

We had a really hard time deciding what to get our attendants. They were all brothers and sisters, and we wanted to get something that would not only be a nice gesture but also appreciated and, dare I say it, actually used.

For my sister and sister-in-law, I went with jewelry. Seems like an obvious choice, I know, but I spent hours shopping (both on and offline) trying to find just the right items that would be beautiful and personal. For my sister-in-law, I picked out this silver necklace from madebysam:

I had it personalized with a citrine stone, which was doubly significant because yellow was one of our wedding colors and happened to be my sister-in-law's birthstone. For my sister, I picked out this owl-riffic number from LittleGreenRoom:

In case you haven't noticed, owls are kind of a thing with me, and that all started with my niece and a pair of owl pajamas I gave to her before she was born. Continuing the owl theme seemed extra important when I saw that this necklace featured and owl that the designer called "Hedwig, the protector." Given everything that has happened to my sister, she needs any extra protection she can get.

For the men, we gave them all the same thing: silver guitar picks with their initials engraved on them from bellabuttondesigns. Sounds kinda silly, but all the men involved each play some form of stringed instrument, and music has been a big role in all of our collective lives. I think they were well received.

Etsy Love, Part 2: Accessories

2010-01-26T22:13:00.000-08:00

Back in the planning stages, I told you about my intentions to purchase ties for the groom and best men from Cyberoptix TieLab and my hair accessory from Portobello. Well, purchase we did, and they were awesome.

I think these photos speak for themselves, but if not, I'll tell you that we got compliments all day on both the ties and my hair clip. And, with the hair clip, the day that I went to get my hair and makeup trials, I wore it from appointment to appointment, and people were stopping me about every 15 minutes to freak out over how cute it was. I loved it. In fact, I still do, and am planning to break it out whenever the occasion might suit.

Photos by Aaron Thompson

Etsy Love: Holly Stalder

2010-01-19T22:12:00.000-08:00

Etsy is just about the greatest thing to ever happen to brides. Ever. Have you found yourself browsing the traditional bridal vendors, only to find nothing that strikes your fancy? Or worse yet, finding out that the thing that strikes your fancy is three times what you can afford to pay? Etsy has your answers! Seriously, whether it's fashion accessories, gifts for the wedding party, or decorations for your reception, you can probably find it on Etsy. Or at least find someone to make it for you. Though I love promoting San Diego vendors that are doing a great job, I found some Etsy vendors that positively made my wedding what it was. I plan to spend the next few posts telling you about the many Etsy vendors that I used.

First up: Holly Stalder. I first discovered her designs on Style Me Pretty when I saw this wedding featured (you'll notice that the bride is wearing a Nicole Miller gown -- I also wore Nicole Miller). After browsing her shop online, I knew that I had to have Holly design something for me. I sent her a convo, and we got started. I told her what I liked, what sort of style I was going for, and sent her pictures of me in my gown. She responded with suggestions, sent me some fabric swatches, and the designing began. She checked in along the way, letting me know how the process was going and sending pictures. When the finished product arrived, I was blown away. I couldn't believe how seamlessly it tied my whole outfit together.

Unfortunately, I don't have a great head-to-toe photo of my in the shrug. I started out wearing it at the reception, but got super hot from dancing and ended up having it off for longer than I anticipated. But people raved about how adorable it was.

Photos by Aaron Thompson

The Devil is in the Details

2010-01-11T17:53:00.000-08:00

Here are some details from the vintage, bohemian decor that we tried to cultivate, both crafted by professionals and by our own hands. Our goal was to find venues that already had very strong visual elements and atmosphere, and simply play off those. Which we did, and I highly recommend letting your venue steer your decorations. It's much cheaper than starting from scratch trying to create an atmosphere that isn't there at all.

Ring pillow: made by me, based off of a project I saw on OnceWed.com

Flower urns at altar: Che Bella

Flowers above and in fountain: my sister, with a little help from some friends

Drink pitchers*: purchased at Cost Plus and Target. I made the little wooden tags, and my friends helped set them up that morning

Flowers on chairs: Che Bella

Menu: done by Bleu Boheme

Favor cards: designed and printed by Inkfancy. The cards state that in lieu of favors, we gave a donation to Stand Up 2 Cancer. But we did affix some fun little buttons, with design elements from our invitations, to each favor card (ordered from Minepress)

Table scape: Flowers by Che Bella, jars* found by me after scouring Ebay and Craigslist. We found more than 150 jars, but doesn't sound like much, but the whole restaurant was positively overflowing with flowers. The table runners were made by JT's mom with fabric I found on TonicLiving

Images by Aaron Thompson with a couple additions from Spencer Tuck.

*Looking for something similar for your own wedding? I'm selling these!

Dress You Up in My Love

2010-01-06T21:43:00.000-08:00

Alright, after falling off the blogging bandwagon in November and December due to the wedding, honeymoon, and holidays, I'm back and ready to share more details with you. But rather than tell you about the details, I'll show you. Let's start with some fashion nuggets.

The dress is Nicole Miller, a wonderful designer for brides that are not interested in spending $3,000 on a gown, but still want to look fashion forward.
The shoes are Belle by Sigerson Morrison, amazingly found on sale at Piperlime.
The purse? That's a fantastic find that my sister picked up at a church yard sale! I couldn't believe the luck at how well it matched the shoes. The little broach and ribbon were additions courtesy of Holly Stalder, who made the broach to match the custom shrug I ordered from her, shown below.

The bridesmaids dresses were the ever popular J. Crew. I thought the ladies looked gorgeous! The men wore their own suits with ties from Toybreaker. The flower girls from JT's side of the family wore their own dresses with green sashes made by JT's mom. My niece wore a dress from SweetPlume, and my sister made her own fabulous feather hairband.

The feather hairpiece was made by Portobello -- I got so many compliments on it! And the earrings? Another great random find at Macy's for only $30!

All images by Aaron Thompson.

Turning Lemons Into Lemonade

2009-12-30T17:56:00.000-08:00

So you know how everyone has those stories about what went wrong at their wedding? We to do, sort of. There were small things that went wrong on the day-of, but honestly, I didn't even notice most of them (and the ones I did notice, I didn't care about). But there was a last minute planning/design emergency that totally freaked me out. But in the end, it ended up making things even better.

On the Monday before the wedding, my friend Laura and I went to the Marston House around noon (approximately the time that the ceremony would take place on Saturday) to check a few things out. Laura would be helping the rental company set up chairs, tables, etc. on the big day. Plus, I was concerned about the sun -- we had initially planned on facing the house, but I was worried that we might need to adjust based on where the sun would be at that time of day.

And my worries were dead on. Once we got there, I realized that if we faced the house, we'd all be staring directly into the sun. So, last minute change of plans, and we decided to flip the opposite direction and face the fountain. Which meant calling the rental company to adjust the placement of the chairs and coming up with some last minute decorations for the fountain.

I know what you're thinking -- that doesn't sound like a big deal. It wasn't. What was? Because the musicians required a shady spot to sit, I was planning on having them sit under the small roofed structure on the west side of the garden. When we got there that Monday...I saw this:

WTF? A beat-up plastic fence in front of some caution tape? A support pillar about to fall over and crush someone? This was not going to work. Since the property is still technically owned by the city, I know calling them would be useless (when have you ever known the city to fix something non-essential in less than a week?). We rented an umbrella for the musicians to sit under, and began brainstorming options for covering up the deteriorating structure. Some sort of curtain? Attaching swags to the plastic fence that the city put up? Then I found it: the rental company had white lattice panels in their inventory. Three of those covered up the caution tape and plastic fencing perfectly. We chose not to decorate the lattice at all because I figured the less we did to draw attention to it, the less likely it would be that anyone would notice that there was something wrong. And that was exactly the case. I don't think anyone even noticed the panels, let alone that there was something crumbling behind them.

I hope my family doesn't mind me posting this picture of them -- it's the only photo that shows the lattice covering up the damaged structure (in the background). As you can see, it looked just fine.

However, the best part about the last minute changes was the decorations that my sister made for the fountain. From day one, before we even knew the when and where, I was daydreaming of having some sort of hanging floral strings, like these. Upon consulting the florist, we learned that, because it would involve so much labor, these would be really expensive. And I didn't trust my last minute DIY abilities (since you can't make fresh floral elements very far in advance), so I just shelved the idea. But my sister kicked into super-maid-of-honor mode, and after a trip to the wholesale flower shop, she spent the Wednesday before the wedding string these beautiful garlands. We also took some of the leftover flowers and scattered them in the fountain's basin. It look absolutely magical.

Something Delicious

2009-12-16T22:06:00.000-08:00

Starting with the cake to recap our reception might seem like an odd place to start, but if you know how much I love sweets, it would make total sense.

There were three vendors that all played a role made our wedding cake the most fabulous confection ever: CAKE, Che Bella, and Jennifer Murphy.

When we first met the team at CAKE, we were sold simply by the fact that the cake tasted great. Why people settle for wedding cake that tastes like cardboard simply because it looks pretty is beyond me. As the name of this blog implies, do not settle for something that looks nice but has no flavor (both literally and figuratively!). The best part about working with CAKE was how a delicious problem had an even more delicious solution. JT and I were having a darn hard time choosing between two flavors -- dark chocolate with hazelnut mousse and dark chocolate truffle filling, and a simply perfect vanilla cake with vanilla creme and fresh raspberries. The solution? CAKE would do both flavors on alternating tiers for no extra charge! People raved about both flavors.

When it came to the appearance and design of the cake, we knew that we wanted a simple, clean design with a touch of whimsy that would show off the true star of the day, our amazing cake topper custom made by Jennifer Murphy. Wondering why we chose a puppy and a bunny for the critters? Here's the slightly embarrassing truth..."puppy" is my nickname for JT, and his for me is "bunny." I know, I know, you can stop making that face now! But words cannot express how absolutely adorable the topper is. It now sits beautifully on our mantel.

CAKE's talented team did a beautiful job with the buttercream frosting (which, by the way, tasted as good as it looked), piping a delicate dot pattern. Che Bella added the touch of whimsy with their flowers. I especially loved the fiddlehead ferns curling along the sides. However, my poor niece had an unpleasant surprise when she picked one up thinking it was chocolate but discovered upon biting down that ferns are not quite as tasty as they look.

Photos by Aaron Thompson

Polaroid Guest Book

2009-12-14T22:39:00.000-08:00

I promise I'll have lots and lots of photos by Aaron Thompson to share with you soon, but in the meantime, let's talk about photos of a different kind: our Polaroid guest book.

We didn't want to do the traditional guest book, and photobooths are all the rage on wedding blogs this year, so of course we wanted to incorporate some sort of photobooth concept. What I thought took it up a notch was the way we gave guests the option of adding a personal message in the photo -- Bleu Boheme has a wall across from the bar that's one giant chalkboard. So next to this wall, we set up a small table with a camera, some extra boxes of film and some chalk with instructions to write a message on the chalkboard and snap your photo in front of it. We got some really adorable, sweet and funny photo messages out of it.

Photo by Aaron Thompson

That is until my mom decided halfway through the reception to use up the "leftover" film and went around snapping through a good 30 sheets....and of course, only about half of the guests had actually made their way over to the chalkboard by that point, so a few of them never got to participate in the fun. But every shot, no matter how goofy or strangely composed, is like gold. It was totally worth the high price that I had to shell out buying Polaroid film on Ebay (because Polaroid was officially discountinued this year, it's been selling like hotcakes on Ebay). But fear not, future brides, Fuji is planning on making a replacement product in 2010.

And Suddenly You're in Love with Everything

2009-12-10T21:15:00.000-08:00

The first photos of our wedding from our totally awesome photographer, Aaron Thompson, are in! Here's a little preview of many more to come.

I'll be posting more along with more details about the reception and great vendors we used, but for the time being, you can see more photos on Aaron's blog.

Vendor Recap: Ipod DJ

2009-11-30T17:54:00.000-08:00

Because so many things happened at the reception, I didn't think a play-by-play would work as it did for the ceremony. Rather, I'll be going item by item, or vendor by vendor. And I've been reluctant to start doing any more recaps until I get the "official" photos back, because I figure that if I'm going to be describing the details of the event, those descriptions should be accompanied by photos.

So I figured I'd kick off more recaps by talking about something that will not be aided by any photos: reception music.

Back when we started planning, we knew we would not be hiring someone to play music at our wedding. From day one of the engagement, we had a giant sheet of butcher paper hanging up our kitchen where we could jot down notes about which songs we would like to play at the party. We spent months adding to the list, JT sequenced and edited them on Itunes (equalizing the volume on each song, making sure all transitions between songs flowed, etc.), and then we loaded the two playlists (one that comprised the cocktail hour and lunch, and one for dancing) onto two Ipods (his, plus his brother's as a back-up in case something went wrong).

A few weeks before the wedding, JT sent me this link in an email:
http://www.adja.org/general/ipodwedding.asp

I thought it was so freaking funny that I made a note that I wanted to go back and blog about it after the wedding. I wanted to wait until after the wedding just so that I could be certain that having an Ipod as our DJ did not, in fact, ruin our wedding. And it didn't. That said, it didn't go perfectly.

There was basically one real problem with the Ipod DJ set up: the restaurant's speakers weren't capable of playing the music loud enough for every song to be heard over our friends and family that were boisterously, and loudly, enjoying themselves. I find it funny that they have music playing every night over hundreds of diners, yet our two families together were louder than all of that. And the soundsystem, which our Ipod was plugged directly into, carried throughout the entire restaurant except for the one corner that we had chosen as the dance floor. This was clearly our bad. This could have been easily rectified with a rented PA system. We just didn't think we'd need it. It really wasn't a big deal though -- most of the songs were heard reasonably clearly.

As far as the cues go, the above video would lead you to believe that a missed cue is the end of the entire world. Believe me, it's not. When we were getting ready to do our first dance, we announced it to our guests and hit 'play' on the dance playlist. The first song was actually a buffer song, meant to give the guests enough time to get up from the dining room and make their way to the dance floor. It ended up being more time than we needed, and we spent a minute or so just waiting for the song to end so we could start our first dance. This was NOT a problem. In fact, it was kind of cute, because some of our guests starting "counting down" to the start of our first dance.

The best part about the Ipod DJ set up is that you have complete creative control. If you want something louder, you can turn it up. If you want to play something again, you can. If you want to pause for toasts, you can. And since you created the playlist and know what's on it, you can use certain songs to cue your activities, so you know that when Ed Harcourt* comes on, it's time to cut the cake without even having to check your watch.

In summary, having an Ipod as my DJ did not, as the video would warn, ruin my wedding. Frankly, paying some cheesy DJ play a song that a family member requested even though I specifically didn't want to hear it would have ruined my wedding. Having to listen to his inane babble in between songs ("this one's for all the laaaddiieees...") would have ruined my wedding. And having to pay someone hundreds of dollars for that would have made it even worse.

*Yes, I will post the whole playlist in the coming days. I know you are dying to know!

Ceremony, Part II

2009-11-20T22:12:00.000-08:00

JT's sister and brother

We made a lot of budget-friendly decisions, but hiring a string trio probably wouldn't be considered one of them. That said, it was a fantastic decision. Francesca at Caprice Strings was super easy to work with, and having two contemporary songs arranged especially for the ceremony made everything so much more meaningful. As we all took our places to begin walking down the aisle, I was feel good...smiling and excited. Then Caprice Strings began playing Badly Drawn Boy's "The Shining," and by the third note, I couldn't hold back the tears. Walking down the aisle, hearing that song, and seeing all of our friends and family gathered around, I'm pretty sure I was teared up all the way to the altar.

My sister and JT's brother

When I joined JT at the front, David (or friend/officiant) casually said "how you doing?" To which I replied, "I'm already crying!" Interestingly, once we got going, I mostly maintained my composure and was able to get through the rest of the ceremony relatively tear free.

We began with two readings. The first was Corinthians. Neither Jeff nor I practice any religion, but our families do, and this was incorporated to honor them. And to honor my family specifically, it was read by my grandfather in French (did I mention that my family is French?). He began by saying that he would read Corinthians 13 in French, just as it had been read to him and my grandmother at their wedding nearly 60 years ago. People commented all day on how beautiful and moving it was. The next reading was a Native American blessing read by JT's mother, which she picked out. Here, again, the tears started to flow. As she began, she got very choked up, which in turn got everyone else very choked up.

For our vows, JT and I worked on crafting our own based on literature. We reviewed several books of "wedding friendly" literary quotes, selected a few that really spoke to us, and crafted those words into vows that David spoke, having us repeat them to each other. It was absolutely perfect, having our vows say exactly what we wanted to express but exchanged in a traditional way. The vow exchange even prompted a few laughs, as David read off a rather long line, and I got halfway through before stopping and asking him to prompt me. Think of President Obama and Justice Roberts doing the Presidential oath. It was a little like that, and frankly, it was kind of a nice way to lighten the tension.

After exchanging rings and the, as David would say, "ceremonial exchange of cooties," we turned and headed back down the aisle to Caprice Strings playing "Summer is Coming" by Matt Pond PA. Amazing.

A little funny side note from the ceremony: Our adorable flower girls (my sister's daughter and JT's sister's two girls) apparently were having difficulty figuring out how many petals to throw and exactly when to throw them, so when they got up to the end of the aisle, JT's brother-in-law said something to the effect of "make sure you use up all the flowers." So the three of them then stood at the end of the aisle emptying their baskets. I wish I could have seen it, because everyone said it was incredibly cute.

I'm Baaaack...

2009-11-18T18:25:00.000-08:00

JT and I made it back from our fabulous honeymoon yesterday evening. We spent today getting reoriented into the regular world -- doing laundry, going to the bank, grocery shopping, all very glamorous stuff. Although we did start out the day by opening our remaining wedding presents. Since we had spent the 20 hours traveling the day before, we fell asleep at 9 p.m. and were up pretty early this morning. Opening presents while having breakfast felt kind of like Christmas.

During the days immediately before and after the wedding, I kept thinking "I should write down notes about all the things I want to remember and share on the blog." And of course, I never did. So I'll try my best to recap what I do remember...which is a lot.

We'll start this evening with a recap of the wedding morning and a bit of the ceremony. Then, in the coming days, I'll share the reception and break down the vendors and their roles as well.

Ceremony, Part I

The morning of the wedding, I woke up promptly a few minutes before the alarm would have gone off. I slept amazingly well -- I had been expecting that I'd be staring at the ceiling all night, too nervous to sleep. Not the case. I felt wonderfully rested. I put on some coffee, set out some bagels for the ladies that would be joining me shortly, and turned on the stereo. At 7:30, my hair stylist, Heather (who has been cutting my hair for the last 5 years), arrived at the house. My sister joined us a bit later, and the makeup artist (Catrina, from Laura Mercier) arrived just as Heather was finishing up. The plan was that I would be done with my makeup at 10:30, slip into my dress and head over to the Marston House at 10:45 to meet JT for our "first look." Remembering the wedding-morning chaos from when I was a bridesmaid at my sister's wedding, where everything was running about an hour behind schedule and people were constantly busting into her prep room with questions and problems, I was prepared to be similarly running late. But at 10 a.m., my makeup and hair were done, and my sis and I were hanging out, chatting leisurely and enjoying our quiet morning together.

Aaron arrived at the house to get a few shots just as we were about to get dressed, and after slipping on our gowns, my sister and I headed out into the vintage limo right on time. Here's me arriving at the Marston House (since Aaron's pro photos won't be ready for a bit, I'm sharing with you some of those taken by our friend Spencer):

After I quickly grabbed my bouquet from Carla at Che Bella, Aaron led me down the side of the Marston House to where JT was waiting for me. While our family and friends finished setting up the ceremony site, JT and I sneaked off with Aaron for our portraits. Words cannot describe how much fun this was. Standing with JT in Balboa Park, both of us wearing these fancy outfits that we had selected months ago, just staring in awe at each other while Aaron led us around the park...amazing.

Meanwhile, here's how things were shaping up in the garden. See all the flower strands dangling over the fountain? My sister made all of those! The were a last minute addition, but they added SO much to the beauty of the "altar." I'm so glad that we added them and so grateful to my sister for making them.

Our drink station looked so cute...I'm not sure if people actually drank anything, and I hear that the water pitcher's seal didn't work and eventually it had to be taken down, but it still looked cute.

At 11:30, right on time, we were all ready to get started and took our places around the corner from the garden. Check back tomorrow for the rest of the ceremony recap!

Best. Party. Ever.

2009-11-08T21:50:00.000-08:00

We did it! We're a couple of married folks now! The wedding was...perfect. Seriously. I kept expecting things to go wrong, and nothing did. At least, nothing that anyone noticed other than me.

We're already getting lots of great photos back from our friends and family, so I'll have plenty to share with you in the coming weeks. But tomorrow, we jet off to Barcelona, so I'll be absent for a little bit, enjoying some quality honeymoon time.

In the meantime, please enjoy this photo taken by our good friend Spencer Tuck. I think it sums it all up nicely.

P.S. Sorry for all the typos in the last couple of posts. I think my mind was elsewhere :)

'Twas the Night Before...

2009-11-06T22:24:00.000-08:00

In 13 hours, I'll be walking down the aisle. It feels totally surreal. I'm nervous and excited and so many more things...mostly thrilled at seeing all my friends and family and how happy they are to be celebrating with us.

Right now, I'm enjoying a bit of zen-Candice time, at home all by myself. I know most people would think it's a little odd to want to spend the night before the wedding all alone, but having a little quite time after a very, very busy week is pretty nice. Over the past week, there have been last minute clitches, many of which I will share with you after the big day (though a few things cropped up that gave me momentary panic attacks, they're actually kind of funny. They'll be even funnier one day looking back). There's been lots of crafting, a small amount of crying, and a ton of laughing. And eating. Here are a few moments from the past 2 days:

I can't believe how quickly the last 9 months have gone by! See you on the other side!

Five Days to Go...

2009-11-02T21:48:00.001-08:00

The purpose of this post is not for me to complain about how much I feel like I still have to do before this Saturday. Or that I feel like everything is going by WAY too fast. Or that my to-do list keeps getting longer instead of shorter. Or that I'm worried that my skin will break out or my dress won't zip up. Or that there are, of course, crazy last minute glitches that I was really, really not prepared for. It's really not about that, I swear.

This post is a public reminder to myself to enjoy the next four days. And to help keep focused on that goal, here's a picture from Sunday's wedding shower (that's right, I said "wedding" shower and not bridal, because it was a shower for both me and JT. Contrary to popular belief, a wedding also involves a groom). The shower was a wonderful moment of just enjoying and not worrying. I give you JT and our friend/officiant David cracking up at....something.

Thanks to Spencer Tuck for capturing this and many other great moments. I highly recommend making friends with people that are talented behind a camera. You will reap many rewards.

Readers Choice, Part Two

2009-10-27T21:16:00.000-07:00

Earlier today, I got a fantastic comment from blog reader Lysa who wrote on the post Hair Raising Accessories, "post pic of rehearsal dress if you have time (which you won't, but post anyway!)" She's right on the money -- with tomorrow marking 10-days-to-go, I'm not going to have much time, but I am going to try to keep posting, as much as I can, in those 10 days. My posts probably won't consist of those planning/vendor-related stories that I've tried to populate this blog with in order to make it the most helpful to other San Diego brides. Instead, my posts between now and the wedding will probably consist of quick snapshots (sometimes literally) of how I've been spending my time. And the good news is that I'll have LOTS of great material for post-wedding posting after we get back from the honeymoon, since there will be plenty of pictures to share along with stories and vendor recaps.

In my post Wigging Out, I asked readers to weigh in on my sister's hair (or rather lack of hair) fashion dilemma. Now it's my turn. No, not for the wedding itself, but for the rehearsal dinner. You saw my previous post about trying to incorporate some sort of veil-inspired hair accessory. Well, here's the dress I purchased over the weekend (sort of):

I couldn't find a picture online of the exact dress, but this one is from the same line and is very similar. The one I got is a brighter blue (more blue-green, less blue-gray) and doesn't have spaghetti straps (it's more of a high scoop neck tank), which I think makes it look a little less casual. But you get the general idea. Something else important to keep in mind is that I'll be wearing black shoes, because that's pretty much all I own. Most likely a pair of wedge heels with ankle straps. Very cute together, but will a little veil work with this ensemble? Will it be overkill? Or will it be just elaborate enough? I've only got a couple of days to decide, so revisit the previous post and share your fashion input!

Hair Raising Accessories

2009-10-21T21:10:00.000-07:00

Yes, it has indeed been almost a week since my last post. We're just shy of two weeks away from the wedding. My job has gone from relatively calm to pure insanity for the remaining two weeks, so between that and the last minute wedding tasks and the first family members arriving on the 30th, I suspect I won't have much time for blogging. I can also feel pretty good saying that there's not really that much left to blog about, because everything's pretty much settled. Now it's just a matter of implementation.

What hasn't been settled? My rehearsal dinner ensemble! JT and I went shopping last weekend, and I didn't find any dresses that struck my fancy. I'm still hoping to find something that will go with a veil-inspired hair accessory, too. In the meantime, here are some more awesome Etsy finds, with just a hint of "bride."

Hems & Bustles has several headbands with small veils attached.

And check out this dainty little headband from Quirky Beauty!

This headband from Brenda's Bridal Veils makes much more of a statement, but it's so darn cute.

I'll try shopping for a dress again this weekend. Wish me better luck.

Wigging Out

2009-10-15T18:13:00.000-07:00

My sister is having a wedding fashion crisis. A cancer-related wedding fashion crisis.

When JT and I first got engaged and set our wedding date, my sister was enjoying a wonderful cancer-free period, even sporting a pretty good head of regrown hair. It was early this summer that we learned her cancer had returned and it was back to chemo she went. No one anticipated that she would be attending the wedding bald.

Frankly, I'm simply happy to have her at the wedding, regardless of the condition of her hair. She can walk down the aisle in all her bald glory as far as I'm concerned. Few people make bald look as good as my sister can. But not wanting her baldness to be the center of attention, we dicussed some options. Perhaps a cool scarf, with a flower pinned to it. Wigs, after all, are uncomfortable, itchy and hot.

But as the day draws closer, she thinks maybe a wig is the way to go after all. A wig provides more possibilities for hair accessories, since it's pretty hard to attach a feathery fascinator without any hair.

Here's where you come in! Help my sister figure out which way to go. Here's a picture of her at another wedding, fully wigged:

And here she is sporting the scarf look:

What do you think? I was partial to the scarf idea, and I think I know why -- to me, my sister wearing a wig looks like a different person. But my sister wearing a scarf still looks like my sister. Of course, I can totally understand feeling like a scarf won't quite cut it on the wedding day and wanting to do something more formal, more elaborate. No matter what, I want her to pick something that makes her feel comfortable.

What do you think?

Welcome to Our Little Corner of the World

2009-10-13T21:05:00.000-07:00

I've gone back and forth about the whole idea of guest welcome baskets several times. At first, I was all excited about the idea of making them. I remembered the weddings I'd been to, and thought that the welcome baskets I'd received as an out of town guest checking into my hotel made me feel way more appreciated than any little favor handed out at the reception. Thinking about ways to cut costs, I thought "I'll skip the favors and just do welcome baskets."

As time went on, JT and I decided on doing some sort of favors after all (actually, we made a charitable donation in lieu of favors). And guest welcome baskets seemed like a waste of money. We're on a pretty tight budget, and expenses kept cropping up like weeds. As we shopped around, we realized that putting together little baskets would set us back way more than we anticipated. Would a little basket in someone's room really make that big of a difference?

Ultimately, I thought it would. We are really fortunate that a lot of our friends and family are flying in from different corners of the country to be here. It may have been an expense, but I think it will be a nice way to say a small "thanks for coming."

So what's in the baskets? I won't tell you everything, because I don't want to spoil the surprise completely for those that will receive them, but you can see a few items here. Our cat, Banjo, was "helping" us put them together over the weekend.

Ready for the first dance?

2009-10-11T21:20:00.000-07:00

JT and I are ready for ours...well, almost! We've been practicing, and it's getting pretty good. A few more times, and we'll have our first dance down cold.

If you're thinking of learning to dance for your wedding (or for anyone else's), I've got a great tip for you: UCSD recreation classes. Ballroom dance lessons have never been cheap. And I imagine with the popularity of shows like Dancing with the Stars, ballroom studios are probably taking the opportunity to clean up. JT and I had sporadically taken dance lessons in the past. A waltz lesson with our friends when they were getting married, a few tango classes just for kicks. I remembered how expensive those tango classes were -- about $10 per person, per lesson. When JT and I talked about taking more serious lessons for the wedding, I started searching. All the ballroom studios charged at least as much as we had paid previously, some even $12 per person per class. And that was just for the group classes. Plenty of studios are touting their "wedding package" that includes a few private lessons for a few hundred dollars.

So I cranked up my internet sleuthing and found a few free and low cost options. The Balboa Park Dancers offer low cost lessons, and the Vintage Social Dancers offer free lessons in the park as well. The problem with these classes, though, was that classes are usually once a month (not great if you are a beginner and need more regular practice) and are taught by volunteers. No offense to the volunteers, but their instruction wasn't really cutting it for us. Then, by total accident, I stumbled across the UCSD recreation class schedule, and the answer was staring me right in the face: Beginning Ballroom Dance for Couples.

The beauty of this class is that it's taught by a professional dancer and there's no partner switching. Ideal for wedding couples. Also, the class focuses on a different style each week. You'll start out learning East Coast Swing one week, then salsa the next week and foxtrot the week after that. Sounds like a lot to take in, but we found that the more styles we learned, the easier it was to pick up on new ones. And the best part is the price: the sign up fee is $42 per person (if you are a UCSD student, only $32). For 8 weeks of classes, that comes out to about $5 per person. Half the price of a studio, but with the same caliber of instruction!

*Photo by Aaron Thompson

Everyday I Write the Book

2009-10-09T20:55:00.000-07:00

My sister has been full of great tips and suggestions when it comes to planning the wedding, but one of the best tips she gave me had to do with the infamous wedding binder. All of you brides out there know you have one -- that binder full of contracts, emails, and pages torn out of magazines. My sister had one when she planned her wedding. So what was her advice? Don't just put all of your wedding documents and inspiration into a plain plastic binder. Put it into some sort of scrapbook, and instantly the tool becomes an album that you can enjoy long after the wedding is done.

I found a generic black faux-leather scrapbook at Michael's, one that has a binding that can be opened up so that you can add and rearrange pages. The pages also have plastic cover sheets. I guess the purpose of these would be to protect your scrapbook pages, but more importantly, those plastic covers were the perfect pockets in which to stick the important wedding related paperwork. I divided it up into sections (ceremony, flowers, fashion, etc.) and began gluing pictures found online and in magazines to the pages. Once the contracts started coming in, they got tucked into the plastic pockets on the adjoining pages, nestled in between design inspiration.

I bought a fancy green pen, and sometimes I even scrawl ideas directly on the pages. And in the very front of the book, I glued in a checklist pulled from Real Simple Weddings and thrill at checking things off that list. It's become like a cell phone or or a security blanket -- something I simply can't be without for very long.

Frock the Casbah

2009-10-07T22:14:00.000-07:00

The attire for the wedding party ladies was finally wrapped up today. I know most people get that taken care of right off the bat, but we like to do things a little differently here at Casa Fight the Fondant. Well, putting off getting the dresses for the ladies wasn't really something that anyone wanted to do -- it mostly got sidetracked because of cancer. But things are going swimmingly at the moment, and while we had a loose idea of what all the ladies would be wearing, we finalized everything today. Woo hoo!

The adult ladies were asked to choose a J Crew dress in "Bright Alpine" taffeta. JT's sister, my bridesmaid, chose the Clementine. It looks fab on her!

My sister and matron of honor chose the Lorelei. I love that they chose two different styles because at first I thought they'd end up picking the same dress (not that that would have been bad, but different is fun).

A quick note for anyone thinking of getting J Crew bridesmaids dresses having only seen them online: order some fabric swatches! Initially, from browsing online, I liked the "Clover" green, which is available in cotton and chiffon. I thought the Bright Alpine looked too foresty. But the pictures above are not really accurate. In person, and especially in the sun, the Alpine looks much closer to the moss green that I am basing our wedding decor on. And the Clover looked downright lime!

Interestingly, the hardest part about dressing the ladies of the bridal party has been coming up with something for the youngest ladies, the flower girls, to wear (and there's 3 flower girls!). Finding something that is cute, affordable, and fits in the color scheme is practically impossible. JT's sister found some great green dresses, but they ended up being much too dark when placed next to the J Crew dresses, and it looked off. My sis found a dress that her daughter would enjoy wearing, but since JT's sis's girls are a bit older, it wasn't really up their alley. The solution? Let everyone's girls just be themselves! JT's sister's girls are wearing white dresses they had from a previous wedding updated with adorable green sashes courtesy of JT's mom. It's budget friendly, and the girls will be comfortable, which is what's most important. My sis's daughter is going with this creation by Etsy vendor Sweet Plume:

Though the three girls won't be wearing exactly the same thing, I think they will all complement each other perfectly. It's amazing to see these things coming together, because I'm continually surprised at how what seemed imperfect at first (like not having a handle on what all the girls were wearing) now feels absolutely perfect.

I'll Be Wrapped Around Your Finger

2009-10-04T22:13:00.000-07:00

I'm not the only one with a special ring now -- JT's got his wedding band! Though he isn't wearing his everyday just yet (for the record, I'm not getting a separate band. I just plan on having one ring, which I am already wearing everyday).

When shopping for JT's band, we set out to find a jeweler that made palladium rings. We wanted something less pricey than platinum, but titanium had too many potential pitfalls, the biggest one being that it can never be resized. So if it doesn't fit just right or you gain/lose any weight, you're just left with a tiny paperweight.

We checked out a few Etsy sellers, but didn't find much in the way of palladium. Then I remembered the awesome jeweler that made my friend Laura's engagement ring: Bario Neal. Not only are their designs unique, but their business practices are ethical to boot. Bonus points. And sure enough, they make several of their commitment bands in palladium. JT chose the Milla in the hammered finish. It's hard to see the texture in the photo I took because I don't have a macro lens that can capture the detail that close, so here is a picture from Bario Neal's website that better shows the hammering texture.

The one problem with ordering from an online vendor that you can't visit in person is sizing. JT and I went to several different major mall chain jewelers to get him sized. And of course, when we went there, each one told us something to the effect of "well, our sizes are specific to our brands, so they won't be the same if you go with someone else." He did end up getting some variance in the results...but I also just think that they were trying to get a sale out of us. At one of the stores, we feigned interest and looked at a few of their rings. Unbelievably, we found one very similar to the one he had picked out on Bario Neal's website, palladium with a hammered finish. For exactly TWICE the price. So, for double the money, I could feel good knowing that I had NO idea how this metal was mined AND be supporting a major retail chain? Uh, no thanks. I'll stick with the awesome indie vendors, thank you. Plus, when you purchase a ring from Bario Neal, it comes in this awesome (and handmade) box.

Well...Have You Sent Yours Yet?

2009-09-30T21:48:00.000-07:00

Once out in the world, our RSVPs started steadily pouring in, between 2 to 4 each day for the past 10 days. I suppose the natural progression is to get a lot right away, then nothing for a while, then many more right around the RSVP deadline. Since we didn't have any in the mail yesterday or today, I think we've hit that mid-point lull.

This is our RSVP card clothesline. Is your card hanging there? Don't assume "Oh, they know I'm coming, so I don't need to send it!" Even if we know you'll be there, we still want your beautiful response gracing this line, so drop it in the mail! We've only received about 30 responses from the nearly 100 people that we've invited, so send yours in and you can feel good knowing that you are helping alleviate my fears that no one will come!

Weekend Update

2009-09-28T22:32:00.001-07:00

Now begins the crunch -- just 40 days to go! Both JT and I knew that after this past week, it was gonna be nothing but appointments and errands, so we had scheduled this weekend to be filled with only fun stuff. Like a sailing trip around San Diego Bay with JT's parents. Little did I know that much more had been planned for me.

My two friends at work had warned me about a special surprise on Saturday, though they gave me very little indication of what that surprise would be. They simply told me to be ready at my house at 11 a.m., at which point they picked me up and whisked me away for an afternoon at the spa! It was pretty darn awesome, and exactly what I needed after a stressful summer. After a massage, a eucalyptus steam, and some poolside cocktails, they dropped me off at home.

But the fun didn't end there. Later that night, JT and I showed up for what I thought was going to be quiet night at our friends' house only to find a surprise party waiting for me. While the guys hung out at home, the girls whisked me out the door and down the street to Lips, a drag dinner theater in North Park. Much hilarity ensued. I told my friend Laura that she could take pictures so long as they didn't end up on the internet. Of course, here I am now sharing a few with you...but only a few.

I'm not a big fan of tiaras...so they got me a really tiny one!

These shots tasted terrible, by the way.

Come Sunday, we hit the seas with JT's folks for a gorgeous sail around the bay. After all the excitement of the previous day, it was a fantastic way to finish off the weekend.

Now...off to the races! Figuratively, of course, since racing season is over.

In Which I Publically Vent My Fears

2009-09-23T22:18:00.000-07:00

Six weeks this Saturday -- that's how long we have until the big day. With it so close, I'm starting to get overwhelmed by fear. Not of marriage or any of that, but of the many things that could go wrong. My biggest fear was that my sister wouldn't be able to attend my wedding. Now that it seems that won't be the case (thankfully!), my brain is being held hostage by lots of tiny little fears. So in the interest "maybe if I share them, they won't happen," here's my current list of wedding fears:

-No one will come.
-Those who do come won't have a good time.
-The Ipod or PA won't work at the reception.
-The chairs or flowers or cake or whatever won't be set up on time.
-Our wedding party or families won't be ready on time.
-I won't be ready on time.
-We'll forget some small but important detail, like chalk for the chalkboards.
-It will be really hot on the day of the wedding (interestingly, I am less concerned about rain. I find rain to be fun).
-Our "first look" won't get timed right and will be spoiled.
-We won't get the processional cues right with the musicians.
-There won't be enough room to dance at the reception.
-There will be so many pre-wedding activities during the week that by the time Saturday rolls around, I'll be really exhausted.
-I won't be able to properly pack for the honeymoon, because I won't have any time to do laundry and won't have any clean clothes to pack (yes, I'm serious!).

And the biggest one weighing on me right now: my dress, which is already very tight, will not zip up. Or will be so tight that I'll be majorly uncomfortable all day.

There's probably more, but for now, let's deal with the dress. I'm picking it up on Saturday from the seamstress. Think good zipper thoughts for me.

Hey, Let's Cross the Sea

2009-09-22T21:18:00.000-07:00

A few years ago, JT and I made a pact that we would take one trip out of the country every year. It started with France. The next year, since France had been a pretty pricey trip, we played it a little closer to home and went to Canada. Last year, we went to Curacao in the Netherlands Antilles.

For our honeymoon, we're hitting up two countries in one trip: Spain and France. We'll be spending 4 days in Barcelona and 3 days in Cannes. The combination of cities basically came from indecision about what kind of honeymoon we wanted to have: did we want a cosmopolitan, urban honeymoon filled with shopping and fine dining, or did we want a relaxing beachside week? I'd never thought of myself as a beach vacation kind of girl, and I'm generally not the kind of person that can lie around doing nothing for very long, but Curacao changed my mind. We had a fantastic time, and I realized that I do enjoy beach vacations...just not the tequila fueled Cabo Spring-Breaky kind.

Usually, for our out of the country excursions, I like to come up with loose itineraries. I don't want every minute planned, but I like to come up with general outlines of what I'd like to see (and eat!). Barcelona obviously has no shortage of great food options. Since I don't speak any Spanish, I'm a little nervous about looking like a giant idiot trying to get around. Especially because I prefer to hit up the un-touristy restaurants where menus are unlikely to have English translations. And eating is one of the most important parts of the trip -- in case you didn't already know, I'm a major foodie.

While I'll probably have a good list of restaurants and attractions to hit while in Barcelona, I'm keeping the schedule for Cannes very unstructured. The Cannes half of the week is meant to be the decompression time. Just wandering wherever the day takes us, and sitting by the beach whenever it's not too cold.

Man, I am really looking forward to this. Time to get some new luggage.

Makeup Dilemma Finally Solved

2009-09-20T18:49:00.000-07:00

The third time was definitely the charm.

The first time was too dramatic. The second was too natural. I was really holding out hope that my third makeup trial would leave me with an easy decision about whether or not to do my makeup myself, and it did.

When I got to the counter, the makeup area was buzzing with people. It was Saturday, and there were plenty of people shopping, not to mention other brides getting their wedding makeup done at the surrounding counters. One woman at a neighboring counter was wearing a rhinestoned "Bride" tank top and had a tiara in her hair.

While the first artist I tried at Laura Mercier was talented, she didn't do onsite makeup and recommended her colleague Catrina. As Catrina worked, she told me about how she will only work with brides that are relaxed and aren't giving off a "stressed" vibe. She patiently worked with me, creating a look that I thought was a perfect balance between that old-school glamor and natural. I was really, really happy with the result. It was the look I wanted, and executed much better than I could do myself. What sealed the deal? A reasonable rate to boot.

I had also done my hair trial earlier that day (like my feathers?), so the look you're seeing is pretty darn close to my look for the big day.

Across the way, the princess bride was finishing her appointment when a passerby asked her if she was getting ready to go to the prom. Catrina whispered "I would never want to be mistaken for going to the prom on my wedding day!" And I knew she was the artist for me.

By the way, a big thanks to my good friend Laura Coburn for being my personal photojournalist documenting the process with these beautiful shots!

Check Your Mail

2009-09-17T23:19:00.000-07:00

There is a lot of space in wedding blog land devoted to showcasing amazing wedding invites. Over the past six months, I've seen so many beautiful invitations featured on other blogs. But I'm happy to say that creating our invitations was one of the easiest things to take care of. We had a designer in mind from the start, and she did awesome work from start to finish, with very minimum direction from us (I love working with people who just "get" us!).

So a big thanks to Tere Mendez at Inkfancy! Our invites are breathtaking (at least in my humble opinion). And also, my apologies, Tere, that the color on these photos isn't great. I snapped them super quick trying to get this post done before heading to bed.

We've had so many ups and downs, especially recently, with the wedding planning, there were times I wondered if we'd ever get to this stage. But here we are, with invites in the mail. And it feels wonderful.

Makeup, DIY Style

2009-09-15T20:40:00.000-07:00

My search for someone to do my makeup has been complicated for two reasons: 1. I'm very self conscious about my skin and the appearance of my face, as the result of having acne for many years. This usually means that I'm unhappy with my makeup when anyone other than myself does it. 2. Money seems to be flying out the door, and paying for professional makeup seems like a great waste if I'm not 100% in love with the results.

Looking at the photos of my first two trials, I have mixed feelings. While the first one did create the "look" that I thought I wanted, in person, it was just way too heavy. The second looked more natural and more appropriate to daytime, but was it any better than something I could do myself? I'm pretty good with makeup, so I decided to have an at-home-trial day.

I did my best to create the first look -- red lips, black eyeliner, a "classic glam" -- just more toned down than this version. In person, I thought it looked OK. It looked pretty heavy but not TOO heavy.

I think it's OK, though not anywhere near perfect, which is what we all hope to look like on our wedding day, right? Also, when JT snapped this photo of me, what looked moderately heavy now looked almost nonexistent. Clearly balancing what looks good in person and on film is going to be difficult. I just didn't feel like my eyes popped enough -- maybe what was missing was some false eyelashes.

I've got another professional trial this weekend. I'm hoping that it will go amazingly well and my problem will have a clear solution. But if it doesn't, should I plan on doing it myself? Would this be acceptable wedding makeup? And am I simply being much too hard on both myself and the professionals by thinking that the results so far aren't that great?

Best. Thing. Ever.

2009-09-13T18:28:00.001-07:00

I know I've been doing a little too much complaining lately, as the stress of everything has been pretty overwhelming and I've been feeling, well...overwhelmed. But on Saturday, we came home and opened up a small box containing our custom cake topper from Jennifer Murphy, and suddenly all felt right with the world.

At first, I wasn't going to post this picture, because I wanted everyone at the wedding to be surprised and taken with how cute it is. But it is just too darn cute and made me too happy not to share it right away.

Also, I love working with all the independent artists that I've purchased wedding items from. Jennifer included this adorable and sweet little handmade note in with the topper. It was so touching, and not the first note of this sort that we've received from a vendor. It's so nice to see people who are really connecting with their customers, even when the transactions are taking place across the country through email conversations.

I've got lots more coming up this week: more makeup experiments, a hair trial, invitations in the mail, and much more. So hopefully that means I'll have lots more posts to share with you as well.

Coming into Focus

2009-09-08T20:35:00.000-07:00

I'm not a big fan of blog-as-confessional. Generally, I don't think baring your soul on the internet will lead to good things. Just ask that girl from Gawker. But bear with me as this post will be partially personal.

I don't like relinquishing control of anything, and right now, with my sister being sick, there's a major element of my life that I can't control. Both she and I are afraid and worried, and know that it's a possibility that she may not be able to attend the wedding at all, what with planes being major germ incubators. Heck, even a healthy person usually can't set foot on a plane without catching a cold. So needless to say, I'm having a hard time balancing the whole joy about getting married with the worry about my sister. Sometimes it causes me to freak out. So the first part of my blog-as-confessional is to say to anyone who may be or has already been subject to a wedding related freakout, I'm sorry. Just know that I'm trying to cope, and it's not always easy. So if I seem unusually worried about a particular detail, it's just because I'm trying to hold on to whatever it is that I can control.

My whole philosophy as a bride from day one of our engagement was to be the anti-bridezilla. To roll with the punches, not stress on the details, and encourage everyone to just have fun with the whole thing. So descending down this path of stress and worry, I ask myself everyday, "Am I turning into a bridezilla?" My biggest fear is becoming "that" bride, the one that everyone dreads. One of my friends recently shared her thoughts about the whole bridezilla moniker with me. She pointed out that every bride (and groom!), no matter how cool, no matter how grounded, will have moments that freak them out. Stress so bad that it seems to dwarf everything else. And that's OK. Having a momentary freakout is OK, so long as you don't yell at anyone, call them an idiot and make them cry. Which I haven't done, so I think I'm still safe.

Part two of my blog-as-confessional is to a plea to our friends and family that are attending: have a good time. Have a blast. Help me stay true to my original vision of the event. Remember that a wedding is, despite all the emphasis on how it is the "most important" day of our lives, a party. An expensive party, sure, but a party nonetheless. The important part, the marriage, lasts well beyond that day. So along those lines, if you are not able to attend for whatever reason -- you can't get time off work, can't get the kids out of school, it's too much of a financial burden -- that's OK. We understand. And to those of you that can attend and will, we are thrilled and hope to show you a really good time. And I hope that you'll also help remind me of this as well, when I start falling back into the state described above.

So, what will be a part of that really good time? I was hoping that it would include a photo booth. Rather than the traditional guest book, guests would step in front of one of our venues massive chalkboards, write a message to us, stand in front of it, and snap a picture. My initial idea was to have a user-friendly Polaroid 600 camera, so that guests could snap pictures of each other easily. But since the film has been discontinued, it's selling for a lot online, making it too cost prohibitive. My next idea is to use this old-school Laminex camera (pictured above) that I got for free with some Fuji instant film. This camera, however, is NOT user friendly. It's hard to pull the film out of the camera, and then you have to let it sit, peel it apart, and try not to get developer goo on your hands.

We first thought about assigning one of our friends to man the camera, but then didn't want to burden one of our guests by having them be tied to one spot all night instead of enjoying the party. So we're thinking of trying to find someone, a friend of a friend or a student or what have you, that we could bribe with a small sum and a free lunch to do the job. Know anyone that's interested?

Working through the Weekend

2009-09-07T17:39:00.000-07:00

What better day to spend Labor Day weekend than, well, laboring. That was pretty much exactly how the last three days have been spent. We knocked out a lot of crafts and tackled a lot on the to-do list. It was pretty darn productive, and frankly, I'm feeling a lot better about what's left to be done. There are still a few big unknowns, but I've got my head around the next 8 weeks pretty well at this point (that's right, we're just shy of hitting the 8-weeks-out mark!)

My friend Laura came over to help me tackle several craft projects, including our escort card tree and flower girl baskets. She and I spent the afternoon cutting, hot gluing, arranging, stringing, and any other craft related verb you can think of. Her keen eye and advanced crafting ability made everything about 100 times better than I could have done alone. Here's the tree she expertly arranged, complete with a little owl that she found for me at Michael's.

I made the leaves. They aren't quite as impressive, but they'll serve as the escort/place cards (whichever you prefer to call them), with the guest's name on one side and their table number on the back.

Next, she set out crafting our flower girl baskets, which look insanely adorable. Plus, with the moss, they perfectly match the ring pillow I made.

The next day, JT and I headed up to his mom's house. There, we went through every single thing on the giant wedding task list, up to the day-of. She amazingly volunteered to take on several projects, which I could not be happier about. There are very few people that I would find more trustworthy than her to help pull off the wedding details.

So while Thanksgiving maybe still be nearly 3 months away, I'm feeling pretty thankful for these wonderful women in my life that are helping me keep it together. Kudos to you, ladies!

License to Wed

2009-09-02T21:41:00.000-07:00

Ever wondered what the process is to get a marriage license in San Diego County? Well, I can tell you!

First, you have to call the County Assessor/Recorder/Clerk's office and make an appointment. Walk-ins are not accepted. They only take appointments between 8 a.m. and 4 p.m. Monday through Friday, but we had no trouble getting one for 8 a.m. the next day when I called.

You have to go online to the County's website and download the forms first. When you go to the appointment, you have to bring the completed forms, IDs for both people, and $50 for the fee. Your appointment will go something like this: You'll walk up to the counter, excited, expecting something important to happen. They'll ask you your names, check you off the appointment list, and tell you to take a seat. You'll sit in a gray waiting room, half decorated with white lattice stapled to the wall for that "wedding" look, for 15 minutes.

Then someone will call your names and ask you to take a seat at Window Number X. There, someone will check your IDs, type all of the info from your paperwork into a computer, print it out, have you check it, have a supervisor check it, have you sign on the dotted line, hand over your money, and PRESTO! You now have a marriage license in your hands.

Your wedding must take place and your officiant must complete and return the license has to be completed by your officiant within 90 days of being issued. Regarding the officiant, I learned something interesting in this process. We don't belong to a church, so we didn't want to get married in a church or by a clergy member. So we asked a good friend of ours to officiate. We had known other people who did this, and they had their friends get ordained online (there are several sites that do this -- our friend went through Universal Life Church). However, I discovered that you don't even need to do that. There's a form that you can complete with the County to become a "Deputy Commissioner" for the day, entitling you to perform marriages on that day only. It's just a simple form and a small fee, and any person of your choosing can officiate!

So that's it. Pretty quick and painless. No waiting period, no blood test, just some very light paperwork. It's kind of anticlimactic, the actual process, but seeing that marriage license in your hands is just a little bit thrilling.

She's Crafty*

2009-08-31T18:56:00.000-07:00

Let the DIY race officially begin! Last week, I made the ring pillow, based off of this one I found on Once Wed. The problem with me and DIY is that I'm a pretty harsh critic of my own work, so I'm rarely satisfied with anything I make. I think it looks OK...not great, but OK.

I also started our escort card tree, based off of this one that I originally saw on Style Me Pretty.

First, I hit up a major chain craft store for supplies. Then I headed over to San Diego's wholesale flower market, and found the supplies I needed for MUCH cheaper.

This coming weekend, I'll be visiting my mother-in-law-to-be. She generously offered to help me sew the table runners. Here's the fabric we'll be using, nestled alongside the 150 mason jars currently residing in our guest bedroom.

I've also enlisted a friend to make the flower girl baskets, plus there's still the photo booth supplies, guest welcome baskets, and a banner for the rehearsal dinner. And I'm sure I'm forgetting something else...so much to do, so few hours in each day!

*You may be upset to learn that, for the record, I don't really like the Beastie Boys. Sorry.

Popular Culture No Longer Applies to Me

2009-08-29T12:57:00.000-07:00

I promise to return next week with wedding related blog posts, but in the meantime, I'm focusing on that other part of my life that has nothing to do with being a bride: music photography.

This weekend, I'm shooting Street Scene 2009. So for now, here's a snapshot from day one. I guess I am officially old, because I cannot for the life of me figure out why anyone would want to wear this:

But even when I was younger, I had an extreme distaste for American Apparel once they abandoned promoting themselves as "sweatshop free" and decided that it was more important to market themselves as the official outfitters of 70s soft core. That and the fact that every band t-shirt I've bought that was an American Apparel shirt immediately shrank and changed color upon washing. But I digress.

Shooting bands seems to have snapped me out of the funk I've been feeling all week, which is a very, very good thing. Be sure to watch for my upcoming shots on Jambase.

Guest Blog: A Taste of Toast

2009-08-26T21:12:00.000-07:00

*I'm pleased to present another guest blog by Laura! I didn't go through the whole caterer search, since I knew that I wanted to have my reception at a restaurant. However, because of my day job, I was pretty familiar with all the big caterers in town. It's great to see this smaller catering group provide brides with such a great, creative option!

After my fiancé and I chose our awesome venue, the next logical step was food. We started the search based on a list of “preferred caterers” our venue recommended. On the list was Toast Catering. Just hours after I’d emailed Toast my inquiry, I got a call back from Sam, the chef. He immediately made a great impression. He asked what our favorite restaurants were and if there were any special things to consider. There were. My fiancé and I are vegetarian, so we wanted an all veg menu. Also, our budget was on the modest side.

Just a couple days later, I received an email from Sam that contained the menu choices and our proposal. Everything looked good - AND was in our budget! Hooray! I decided on what our menu would be for our tasting and we scheduled a date.

The tasting was really cool. Sam and his wife, Kim, are the owners of Toast. They share a commercial kitchen in La Mesa and for events, like our tasting, they book the kitchen and use it to prepare food. They also bring an oven/stove to the event site on the day of and make food there so everything is fresh! Sam handles all of the cooking and Kim helps with the “front of house” activities like tables, etc.

After introductions and some preliminary questions about our wedding came the food. My fiancé and I loved it. The menu included vegetarian twists on typical meat dishes, like vegetable wellington:

And mini tomato burgers:

Plus falafel, stuffed peppers and more! It was amazingly wonderful. For each course, Sam and Kim explained what it was and left so we could eat and talk about the food. Both Sam and Kim were amazing. They were polite and not at all pushy.

After a totally opposite tasting with a second caterer the next day, my fiancé and I knew that we were sold on Toast. Sam and Kim are really nice and genuine people and the food was by far the best. Now we’ve signed on with them and are looking forward to moving onto the next step – linen colors.

I Just Know That Something Good is Gonna Happen

2009-08-24T22:19:00.000-07:00

Yes, dear reader, you already know how important a role music will play in our wedding. Our string trio, Caprice Strings, is specially arranging two songs for playing during our ceremony (not going to spill the beans just yet on what those two are!). Our reception, much to the dismay of cheesy wedding DJs everywhere, will be DJd by an ipod. JT's already taking a crack at composing the playlist. We've selected the songs, and now he is painstakingly editing transitions, adjusting levels, etc. Frankly, I can't imagine not using an ipod...how could you relinquish control over your playlist like that?

I'm not going to give it all away, but here are some teasers:

Whiskeytown - Don't Wanna Know Why
The Misfits - Astro Zombies
Kate Bush - Cloudbusting
Wilco - California Stars
The Delays - Long Time Coming
Broken Social Scene - Almost Crimes
Sleater-Kinney - Modern Girl
Elliott Smith - Pretty (Ugly Before)
Wolf Parade - I'll Believe in Anything

Some we chose because they are just fun, some we chose because of the meaning or sentiment, and some we chose just because of a special connection to the song. Plus, we've picked out a great song for our first dance...one that I hope will have a special meaning for our families. You'll just have to wait to see why!

¡Dios Mio!

2009-08-20T23:16:00.000-07:00

Check out this gorgeous shot from our wedding photographer Aaron Thompson. He snapped it at a recent wedding reception at Casa Guadalajara in Old Town's Bazaar del Mundo. How fun does this look?

And just imagine all the fun ways you could play off the setting. Loteria card-inspired invitations (the photo below is of Loteria-inspired table place cards, via Style Me Pretty).

Plus, it'd be a great place to break out this cake topper by Skull Queen. JT and I loved the idea of using this cake topper, back when we were considering this venue as a possible reception site.

They don't post their full catering information online, but based on the prices at the restaurant itself, you could probably have a pretty festive yet cost effective shindig at Casa Guadalajara.

Dress Rehearsal

2009-08-19T21:53:00.000-07:00

The one thing that's a little sad about choosing your wedding attire is knowing that that's it -- you only get one outfit, one "look" for your wedding day. I know some women are jumping on the bandwagon of having two dresses, one for the ceremony and one for the reception, but unless you are loaded or your second dress was super cheap, it's just not practical.

Don't get me wrong -- I LOVE my ensemble and my look. Trust me, when you see the photos after the event, you will too. But I can't help but be smitten by all the other cute fashion statements I could be making, especially when it comes to the little things like hair accessories. When searching for wedding makeup tips, I read a feature on Martha Stewart Weddings some time back that said something to the effect of "you want to look like yourself on your wedding day, but why not try out a new or bold look at your rehearsal dinner?" Sounds like fun, right?

Check out these cute hair options. The other day I asked JT if it would be weird to wear a veil on the day of the rehearsal. I mean, how many opportunities in your life do you have to wear a veil anyway?

The clip above from Baroque and Roll has a hint of veil, and this headband below from Be Something New has even more veil, without actually being a veil. I think it'd be perfect for a rehearsal dinner!

Or, this other cute headband from Be Something New would be a fun choice. No veil, but it still has a hint of bride to it, yet it's understated enough to be worn on a non-wedding occasion. Maybe I'll need two: one for the rehearsal and one for the shower. I'm basically using all wedding week activities as an excuse to purchase fabulous accessories.

Ring Around the Budget

2009-08-17T22:15:00.000-07:00

As I've hinted in the past couple of posts, we've had some unexpected and major expenses crop up lately, and we've been looking for areas to trim from the budget. One area that JT brilliantly saw that could be downsized was his ring. I had been anticipating that he would want a plain brushed platinum band. Simple, classic, and...expensive. But after doing a bit of research, JT found two other metal options that he really likes that also happen to be much cheaper than platinum: titanium and palladium.

Palladium is in the platinum family, so it's similar in hardness, color, etc. But it's not quite the darling of the jewelry industry the way that its sister metal is, so it's more cost effective. JT found this ring by DragonsBreath on Etsy that he really likes:

I really like it, too. I love the natural look of the hammered finish.

Titanium is an even more affordable option. It looks very "manly," so it's become quite popular in men's rings, and it's not hard to find titanium rings at major jewelry retailers these days. The downside to titanium is that it's so strong, it can't be resized once it's cast. So if JT gains or loses any weight, he'd have to get a new ring. But, as he put it, the cost of a titanium ring is so cheap, that it wouldn't be a very big deal to get it replaced. These two are from TitaniumKnights:

Both great, and at less than $100 each, he's right -- it wouldn't be a big deal to replace it if in a few years it no longer fit. Though that does seem slightly unsentimental, but is sentiment worth the extra money? Sometimes you just have to be practical. I won't love him any less with an inexpensive ring.

Basket Case

2009-08-13T22:03:00.000-07:00

With some big financial issues springing up this week (man, I wish I didn't own a car!), we've been looking at ways to trim the wedding budget. Not that I think our budget is heavy on splurges, but there are a couple, so anything we can trim, we will.

One thing that came to mind was flower girl baskets. We've got three flower girls, and rather than having the florist do them, it would save us a bit of cash to buy and fill them ourselves.

In case you haven't picked up on it yet from my other blog posts, I seriously think that Etsy is the greatest thing to ever happen to wedding planning. Check out these adorable baskets, all handmade and all at reasonable prices to boot.

I'm loving this birch one from NHWoodscreations. I love how natural it looks. Nothing like those white shellacked ones that are the standard wedding fare.

This one from Yandebridal is adorable too! I'm a complete sucker for cute woodland creatures.

Kiss and Makeup

2009-08-11T22:09:00.000-07:00

Professional makeup and I had a bit of a falling out*. I'm super picky to begin with, but the fact that I have to pay for each trial session I book with a makeup artist isn't helping, because I'm basically being penalized for being extra picky.

One of my friends suggested that I hit up the Laura Mercier counter in Fashion Valley, because she had had good results there. I never, ever thought that I'd get good results at a mall makeup counter, but I figured some free experimentation never hurt anyone.

I went in with a totally different approach than that first professional trial. Rather than showing the artist pictures and trying to create a specific look, I told very nice Laura Mercier artist, Jessica, that I was still trying to figure out my look and was hoping to get some suggestions. And this time, I brought along a friend for reinforcement, feedback and picture taking.

Jessica went a completely different way than the previous look I had tried. More natural, with slightly earthy green eye shadows and much subtler lips and cheeks. It really was a pretty great result -- nothing like I had originally thought I wanted, but I had to admit, the more natural and (dare I say) more "summery" look was actually kind of nice on me.

That said, when I got home, JT said that he missed the red lipstick. So, to try and blend the two styles, I changed up the lipstick. Bold lips, more natural on the rest.

Maybe this is the compromise I need? A little dramatic, not super dramatic? What do you all think?

*Incidentally, I just had to sink a ton of money into repairing my car. So to compensate, we're having to look for areas of the wedding budget we can tighten. Makeup might be one...so I might end up doing my own makeup after all.

Good Decisions

2009-08-09T22:39:00.000-07:00

Here it is -- JT's actual suit! He chose wisely, didn't he? Almost makes you think you're looking at a picture of Justin Timberlake, huh? They do have the same initials, after all...

It's amazing what a difference the little details make, too. The very first time he tried it on, he was wearing it with a t-shirt and no shoes. The second time, he added a dress shirt and shoes from the store. Suddenly, even though it looked good the first time, it now looked much better. Incidentally, when asking for a dress shirt at Ted Baker, I asked for "just a white shirt," something that wouldn't detract from the suit. The salesgirl looked at me baffled and said "this is Ted Baker...we don't have white shirts!" He ended up trying it on with a light green shirt.

Once we got it home, he tried it on with one of his shirts, one of his ties, and his own shoes. And as you can see, it all works wonderfully. Ditto for me and my ensemble. My friend and I had a little dress up session this afternoon now that I have all of my accessories purchased and in hand. Once all the pieces are together, they are so much more powerful than they were individually. Funny, that's kind of how I feel about me and JT.

That's why I think I chose wisely, too.

Trial and Error

2009-08-05T21:48:00.000-07:00

Tonight I had my first makeup trial. I saw first, because there will be others. This artist came recommended by someone I trust, so I was holding out good hopes for the appointment, even though I've rarely been happy after having my makeup done by someone else.

Since we've got a lot of vintage flair to our wedding, I was thinking of going with an old Hollywood kind of make up style. You know, red lips, black eye-liner. Here's an example of one of the photos I brought in as a guide:

I'm generally pretty comfortable with heavy makeup in the past, but lately I've been wearing less and less. And just about every wedding resource out there says "don't go nuts with your makeup -- you'll want to look natural and look like yourself." Well, I felt like the end result was very dramatic, nowhere near natural. Not that it was necessarily a bad thing, and I still looked like "myself," just myself in very dramatic makeup.

Looking at the picture, it doesn't look nearly as dramatic as it did in person. In fact, the picture looks pretty darn good, but I think the flash is washing it out a bit, making the colors less pronounced. JT agrees that, in person, it looked more dramatic (the blush in particular). So I'm not sure what to think...is dramatic OK? Will people think I've gone overboard? Will I look way too made up? Or should I just embrace being super glamorous?

Cool Venue Option: Condor's Nest Ranch

2009-08-03T20:15:00.000-07:00

Trying to help my recently engaged friend come up with some unique wedding venue options (she, too, is not a fan of the whole hotel-ballroom-thing), I stumbled across this venue. It didn't really work for the style of event that she and her fiance had in mind, but it was so darn cool, that I just had to share it with the world!

The Condor's Nest Ranch is way up in the northeast corner of the county, just shy of Temecula, really. It is the perfect mix of kitschy and down home farm, perfect for a hipster barbecue wedding!

What I loved most after checking out their website was not only how cute it was (I mean, that helps, a LOT!) but also the affordability and all the options for crafting your event. Their pre-planned packages break down to basically $100 per person, but that amount includes everything you could ever possibly need for a wedding, including food, beverages, bartenders, tables, linens, a DJ, all venue fees, set-up and clean up, lighting...it's a pretty darn good deal!

And if the pre-packaged plan isn't your thing, you can mix and match and play with all of their options a la carte, too. Even their menu has limitless options, ranging from super cute BBQ style (peach cobbler, at a wedding? I love it!) to rack of lamb to kobe beef sliders to tapas!

There's rooms for you and your family or guests to stay in overnight, and with no neighbors within earshot, your party really can go all night! And bonus points for the fact that the property is running over with adorable animals, from peacocks to llamas.

If I had found this place sooner during my planning process, it would have been a major contender!

Groom Guest Blog: Following Suit

2009-08-02T22:43:00.000-07:00

*Sorry for the lack of posts last week -- I'll try to not let that happen again this week! Let's get the week kicked off right with a Groom Guest Blog from JT: the suit has been purchased!

After a long day of trying on suits (probably about a dozen or more after all was said and done), I had a lot of different retailers and looks to consider. But when it came right down to it, only about three different suits I tried on really had a chance of coming home to my closet. The finalists were Banana Republic, Theory and Ted Baker.

With the idea that trying on the suits I liked a second time would help me reach a decision, we started right back where we came from, at Ted Baker. This time around, Candice suggested I try the suit(s) on with a dress shirt and a pair of dress shoes, just to get the complete picture of how I would look once everything came together.

I stepped out of the dressing room, and my decision was made. It's funny how much of a difference a few seemingly minor elements make, but once the complete outfit was on, I knew that this* was the suit. And once the tailor was called in to get the measurements just right, I was able to visualize just how awesome it would look once all the alterations were made.

So, I tip my hat to Ted Baker, and their fab selection, from which I was able to find the one special suit I would have the honor of wearing on my wedding day.

*editor's note: the suit shown in the link isn't the exact suit -- it's the same cut, but the fabric pattern and color is slightly different. For reference, it's the second of the Ted Baker suits in JT's previous post.

Shoes = Done!

2009-07-29T21:11:00.001-07:00

Sometimes it just all works out...

After my many shoe posts, I've found the perfect pair! I've spent a good amount of time trolling Zappos and Piperlime for yellow flats. I didn't want patent leather, because there's just something about patent yellow that feels like rain boots. And I didn't think satin would be the best choice, because I'd probably never wear them again.

Then, I stumbled across a pair of Belle by Sigerson Morrison yellow leather flats. On sale. With only two sizes left in stock, one of which was actual mine.

They are a tiny bit big but super comfortable and look great with the dress. And the clutch? My sister found it at a church yard sale! Can you believe the luck? It's almost like it was meant to be...

Now I just need to find some earrings.

Hats Off To You

2009-07-28T22:05:00.000-07:00

The past few days have been a little unnerving. Not because the wedding is quickly approaching (which it is, and there are still many details to sew up) but because I'm starting to once again feel like my wedding is the source of pain or conflict for my family. That is, of course, the absolute last thing that I would want. But with my sister's recurring cancer and her checking back into the hospital, I can't help but feel like my wedding is a giant inconvenience for everyone.

I try to remind myself that with so much turmoil in our lives, that our wedding is a much needed bright spot. And I truly, truly hope that is how my family sees it...because that is what I want it to be. Sure, travel can be taxing, but I hope everyone takes it as an opportunity to relax. No need to fret about the details -- just spend a couple of days soaking up the beauty of San Diego and come to our party while your here. I hope that's how everyone else is feeling.

That was a really long, drawn out way of introducing today's post: hats! I just recently started browsing for hats that my sister could wear at the event that might compliment her dress. The bridesmaid/maid-of-honor dresses will be from J Crew. I'm asking the ladies to select whatever style they prefer, so long as it is in the "Bright Alpine" silk taffeta. Here's an example, from the recently launched Fall collection:

Finding cute hats is a challenging task for many reasons, one of which is the reminder that my sister is experiencing my wedding in the worst context possible. She's been so positive about the whole thing, so I'm trying to be that way too and enjoy the cute hats for what they are -- cute hats! Here's one from Anthropologie that incorporates the others colors from our wedding scheme:

This one from Etsy seller NadineNewYork is darn cute too.

Got any good hat tips for us?

Groom Guest Blog: I Know What I Like (In Your Wardrobe)

2009-07-26T22:32:00.000-07:00

*The second installment of JT's suit shopping adventures!
The second leg of the Great Suit-Finding Journey brought us to Orange County, specifically to South Coast Plaza in Costa Mesa, as its selection of designer stores makes it stand out from the usual crop of shopping malls. Because of this, it's one of a very short list of reasons for us to actually go to Orange County. Nonetheless, we were met with significantly more options than we had during the first go-round, making this part of the search far more promising.

First, we hit up Ted Baker, a designer known for designing shirts with bright, garish colors, and stylish, hip suits for gentlemen who prefer a fitted, slimmer look. I tried on four suits there, two of which were eliminated quickly, and two that were immediately selected as finalists for the big purchase.

In particular, a charcoal suit with a unique pattern, almost pinstripe-meets-herringbone. Not sure if that makes sense but the picture might give a better visual.

In any case, it was rather eye-catching, and Candice and I both were impressed with its look.

Next came John Varvatos. JV has a reputation for making a damn fine looking suit, and we did find a selection of sharp looking suits. Unfortunately, they were clearing out inventory and mostly had sizes that were far too big for an understated gentleman such as myself. Nonetheless, I bet they'll have some awesome stuff later on.

Hugo Boss came next, a designer whose selection had been recommended to me from a handful of different parties. I was feeling optimistic about Hugo Boss, and let's be honest, it's a name synonymous with making sharp suits. When we entered the store we certainly found a broad selection of suits, though none of them looked quite right on me. And after taking a look at the price tags, they also proved to be among the more expensive brands. The combination of high price and underwhelming appearance (on myself, though they'd likely look great on someone else) eliminated them from the running.

After Boss, we hit up Nordstrom, another promising source, with a department of skilled salesmen to match. I used to work at Nordstrom and have seen how well trained they can be, so I had a good feeling going in. Immediately, a salesman greeted us, told me he'd find my size without asking, and sure enough, he went straight for 38, which I had previously discovered to be the right fit. He brought out quite a few different looks, some of which were a bit too big, some of which were closer to being just right. This Joseph Aboud seemed promising, but the cut of the pants' legs was far too wide.

It was around here when I discovered just how unusual a suit size I am. As I've said before, I'm a pretty slim guy, but proportionally sound, or so I thought. Apparently American men are supposed to be triangle-shaped, because I began to find discrepancies between the jacket sizes and the pant sizes that I was trying on. After going through the 38s, the salesman suggested I might possibly be a 36 in certain designer cuts, and handed me a fantastic-looking John Varvatos three-piece suit that quickly became my top pick. The jacket and vest fit like a dream, but the pants...and this is where it becomes a crushing disappointment...were a size 29. I'm a skinny guy, but there's no way in hell I could squeeze into a 29. Needless to say, that suit was out.

After Nordstrom, we regrouped and headed to Theory on a whim. Interestingly enough, they had one suit. And that one suit was awesome. Clean look, good fit, a solid choice all around. Granted, it wasn't the cheapest suit, but sometimes you have to weigh whether or not spending a little more for a finer look is worth it. And it was still a good $500 less than Hugo Boss!

Lastly, we went back to Banana Republic, out of the feeling that, perhaps, a different location might bring about a different selection. And sure enough, we did find quite a few different suits that weren't stocked on our prior BR shopping trip. One in particular was a brand new suit—-I was told I was the first one to try it on—-a gray striped number that looked surprisingly good on me.

At the end of the day, we did, in fact, find the right suit, but I'll save that for another post.

Guest Blog: Bridal Bizarre

2009-07-22T22:19:00.000-07:00

Guest Blogger Laura returns with her recap of the San Diego Bridal Bazaar! As a fellow off-the-beaten-path kind of bride, I knew she would be both amused and shocked by some of the wares being paraded, and her summary says it all!

When I heard commercials on the radio for a San Diego Bridal Bazaar at the SD Convention Center, I knew I had to get tickets. The complete list of vendors was listed online, and included chocolate fountains and dove releases. That's right, doves.

Walking into the convention room was quite an experience. Upon entry, a cascade of bubbles showered over you, and you were given a respective "bride" or "groom" name tag to wear. I chose not to wear mine, thereby keeping a bit of mystery as I flitted through the vendors.

To be fair, the Bazaar wasn't all bad. I was very excited with the gift bag I received from the local representative from The Knot. It contained Crest whitestrips, coupons, a microfiber cleaning cloth, and an edition of the Southern California Knot magazine. I also enjoyed the plethora of free cake samples and the San Diego Zoo and Wild Animal Park booth. The zoo was another venue I'd been interested in and it was very cool to just be able to walk up and ask questions instead of emailing back and forth or playing phone-tag.

On the flip side, there were....well....some duds. One part I'd been looking forward to was the fashion show. I was bummed to see more of what I'd seen online at mainstream bridal gown stores. There weren't any dresses that smashed tradition or hinted of innovation. Sequins, ill-fitting busts and miles of taffeta crisscrossed along the runway.

This was one of the few dresses that I thought was at least a bit cool, and it was in the "mother-of-the-bride" section.

Here was another dud. As a modern chick, I cringe when I see images like these where the groom gets dragged off into marital horror. But if you dig the association with being a terrible she-orge, this cake could work.

Guest Blog: Laura and the Great Venue Search

2009-07-20T17:58:00.000-07:00

I'm still across the coast, in the state that they claim is for lovers, so for today's post, I'm very pleased to welcome guest blogger Laura! Laura is a good friend who recently got engaged and is just starting to begin planning her wedding. I hope having another bride's perspective on the process will be helpful and entertaining!

For my fiance and me, one of the first steps in planning our wedding is finding a great venue. We really want to pick a spot that had a lot of personal meaning for us. We're also not religious, and since that means we won't be having a church ceremony, we wanted to find a place where we could hold the ceremony and reception in the same area.

My first venue idea was a local organization I'd contacted earlier in the year for a birthday party rental. While the birthday party didn't end up taking place there, I still had their price list and was excited to set up a meeting with their event staff. When I contacted the event coordinator, however, I was given a whole new price list, the special "wedding" price list. Basically, because the event was now a wedding, their venue rental went up by 30% along with other misc. charges. Sadly, the price increase didn't come with any new perks either. I have to admit I was tempted to say it was a birthday party and I'd just happen to be wearing a white dress ;)

For some couples, the idea of paying extra to hold their wedding in a meaningful place might be just fine. For my fiance and me, however, we opted not to. We're leaning toward another local venue that has a flat fee for birthdays, company parties, and weddings.

Here are some of the resources for cost-savvy SD venues that we've been using:

- The City of San Diego website. They have this wonderful list of parks and other public areas that are popular for wedding sites: of parks and recreation areas. Best of all? They’re super cheap.

-The Balboa Park website. It’s not as detailed, but still gives some good ideas. The site also lists all the museums/venues in Balboa Park, and you can contact the venues individually for their rental options.

Check back soon for Laura's summary of the San Diego Bridal Bazaar (with pictures)!

'Til Tuesday

2009-07-16T17:15:00.000-07:00

Hi folks,

I'm off to the other side of the country for a few days, so there won't be much blog posting from me. However, my good friend Laura may contribute a guest blog or two while I'm gone!

In the meantime, please enjoy this photo, courtesy of Aaron Thompson.

Details, Deposits, and DIY

2009-07-15T17:53:00.001-07:00

With less than four months to go, we are spending a lot of time buckling down on details. I've been flooded with fabric swatches lately -- for the bridesmaids dresses, for the table runners, for the ceremony accessories. Of course no two greens could ever match, right?

Speaking of table runners, that bring me to another point: DIYing stuff. Earlier I posted my concern about DIYing, specifically who can set up all your DIY stuff when you are getting ready. Friends and family have generously stepped forward to handle things. My buddy Laura will be setting up the beverage service at the ceremony (not sure she knows the extent of that yet!). My sister-in-law to-be has offered her help sitting up items at the reception, as has my florist.

One thing that we are not DIYing is setting up the ceremony chairs and tables. When I started getting quotes for the rental items, I asked how much more it would cost to have them set up by each company. The cost was usually minimal, 40 cents per chair, one dollar per table. Oh wait, you want your tables and chairs delivered? Well, that's gonna cost you. Oh, and you want them delivered and picked up at a specific time? That's gonna cost you even more! But ultimately we decided it was worth the couple of hundred dollars to have the piece of mind of not worrying how to schlep 80 chairs down from a rental warehouse the day before the wedding.

What will not be worth the extra cost? Having the table runners sewn for me. The quote that I got was more than three times the cost of the fabric itself, for sewing a very simple item. That one will definitely be DIY, even if my sewing machine isn't that good.

Finally, we just confirmed that we will be having our rehearsal dinner at The Linkery -- yay! I need to get them a deposit check, so I'm off to take care of that now.

In the Bag

2009-07-14T20:45:00.000-07:00

Holy cow, how amazing are these purses by Eclu? And at such great prices, I would totally buy some of these just for "everyday" special occasions. Like dinner on a Wednesday.

Groom Guest Blog: Suit Up

2009-07-12T22:41:00.000-07:00

*This is the first in what will (hopefully) be a series of Groom guest blogs by JT!

When Candice and I began planning our wedding, I had decided early on that I would be wearing a suit, rather than a tuxedo. In fact, I had pretty much decided that even before proposing. I have two brothers and a sister, and I've been in all of their weddings. And at each of their weddings, I wore a rented tux. The first two times, I didn't think much of it, maybe because I was younger. But by the third time around, I couldn't help but notice how uncomfortable tuxedo pants are. And on a summer evening, the last thing you want to be wearing is a pair of pants made of a synthetic fabric that doesn't breathe (granted ours will be a fall wedding, but comfort is comfort no matter the season).

Beyond comfort, however, I like the look of a suit better, and Candice would wholeheartedly agree. There's something more stylish about it, more classic. A tux seems a bit too formal. If I were to rent one, I'd feel like I wasn't putting enough effort into how I looked on our big day, and if I bought one, I'd feel like I was wasting money on something I'd never wear again, and quite frankly, probably wouldn't want to. If I were to buy a suit, however, I would have numerous occasions to wear it, making it more practical. When it comes right down to it, it's a pretty easy decision. Stylish look + practicality - itchy polyester pants = win.

This weekend, Candice and I went on our first excursion to shop for a suit, starting with Banana Republic and J. Crew. At Banana Republic, I tried on two styles: the modern fit and the tailored fit. As a slim gentleman, I fit into what was essentially the smallest size in both.

The modern fit wasn't a bad start, and came in a broader variety of colors. However, the jacket seemed a bit too wide and boxy, which is a problem I notice in a lot of men's suits. As I said, I'm on the slim side, and a more tapered fit is more flattering on me.

With that in mind, the tailored fit was a much better option, making my torso look far less square shaped. Yet while the fit was good, the colors left something to be desired. Blue pin stripes just aren't going to cut it for our needs.

After Banana Republic, we went to J. Crew. They had nothing. Not one suit. Not even a proper pair of dress pants. Some faded khakis if I recall, a few casual dress shirts. That's about it. We suffer the misfortune of living in a city where CEOs and attorneys can feel comfortable wearing Hawaiian shirts and flip-flops apparently, or so you would believe by the terribly limited selection at some retailers. Nonetheless, I expected more from J. Crew.

From there, we went to Barney's Co-op, which had a few suits, but they were either too large or the wrong color or pattern (plaid might be fun for another occasion, but not our wedding). And after that, we called it a day. Next time, we plan to tackle some designers' stores, which should yield better results. If nothing else, we have a better idea of what looks good on me.

Well Suited

2009-07-10T22:20:00.000-07:00

This weekend, we'll be checking out the suit options for JT at those staples of classic clothing, Banana Republic and J Crew. They've got some promising looking options online, but I suspect shopping for a suit will be a lot like shopping for my gown - what looks good on the model in the ad doesn't always look good on you.

The one above is from J Crew, and the one below from BR.

This one is from John Varvatos, available at Nordstorm.

Three pieces for $795? Not too shabby. I love the look of a three-piece suit, but JT has a long torso, and the vests he's tried on in the past didn't work for him. The most important criterion with finding a suit will be finding something that doesn't look boxy. Boxy = bad. Boxy = unattractive. JT is a slim, small framed guy and won't want to look like a linebacker on our wedding day.

Engagement Pics, Part Deux

2009-07-09T17:29:00.000-07:00

JT and I are running off to take our first official dance class tonight (we've taken a few "drop in" classes before), so I'll leave you this evening with a few more shots from our engagement shoot with Aaron Thompson.

Piece by Piece, It All Falls Into Place

2009-07-08T22:38:00.001-07:00

We officially have only four months left to go. The little details, like when chairs will be set up at the ceremony site, are starting to become the focus of our attention.

On Monday, a found a woman through Craigslist that had 120 assorted mason jars that was willing to sell them all to me for a low price. They are all different shapes and sizes, and as you can tell, some are very, uh, antique, shall we say. Which will be really cool, once they have been cleaned off, that is.

Going over the schedule for the ceremony, getting my dress altered, finalizing the wording for the invitations...these are all on the upcoming to-do list for me now. Crunch time is going soon, I can feel it.*

*On a pleasant note, JT says that the closer it gets and the more details fall into place, the more exciting and great it feels. And I really love hearing that.

Shoegazing

2009-07-07T21:40:00.000-07:00

For some reason, finding just the right pair of shoes is proving much more difficult than I thought. I've already expressed my discomfort with buying certain items online, and I'm having a hard time finding the kinds of shoes that I'm looking for in stores, so that's been causing me to delay purchasing anything.

Nonetheless, I've got a few more finalists. But I need help narrowing down some options. First, suede vs. satin:

Both of the above are from Steve Madden. Satin gives me more ability to perfect the color, because I can dye it myself. I always thought that there was something that felt icky and tacky about dyed shoes, but these Steve Madden options have such nice lines that I think they would actually be quite cute. However, suede would definitely be more wearable after the big day.

OK, next challenge: low heel vs. no heel:

As I've mentioned, JT is about the same height as me. So anything above a one inch heel means I will be taller than him. The first option is from Steve Madden and has a nice, low heel. The second from Nina is just over the too-tall border (a two inch heel), but the design is so cute and can be customized to be ordered in yellow.

So what do you think? Suede or satin? Low heel or no heel?

Sharp Dressed Man

2009-07-05T21:36:00.001-07:00

With my ensemble mostly in place (I still need jewelry and shoes), JT and I are turning our attention to his wedding attire. We both think that it's completely ridiculous that women are expected to spend thousands of dollars on a dress that they will wear only once, and yet on the "biggest day of their lives," men are expected to wear an ill-fitting tux with all the comfort of a burlap straight jacket that they rented from the Men's Warehouse for $60.

It's not simply the fact that women are held to incredibly high standards of beauty that bothers me...it's the fact that men aren't expected to follow suit (pardon the pun). JT is very much looking forward to being sharp dressed on our wedding day in a designer suit. And the plus side is that he will be able to wear it again and again!

I'm enjoying these options from Ted Baker right now:

When we start suit shopping, JT will give you the play-by-play, much like I did with my dresses.

I've Been Looking So Long at My Pictures of You

2009-07-03T19:29:00.000-07:00

We just got our first engagement pics back from Aaron Thompson! Here's a few to sneak peeks.

You can see a few more on Aaron's blog, too. And I'll post more when we get the full set, so check back soon!

There's some tired words that would carry the meaning, but I'm still choking on the first one

2009-07-01T21:03:00.000-07:00

In my day job, I do a lot of writing. And public speaking. And writing for other people who will do public speaking. But when it comes to having to write something deeply personal that expresses my love for my husband-to-be publicly (as in vows), that gives me some major writer's block. Actually, you couldn't even call it writer's block because I haven't gotten that far yet. JT is, being a professional journalist and all, and amazing writer (seriously, have you read anything he's written? If not, you should. Blows my mind.). But he also agrees that the idea of trying to write out our very intimate feelings for each other will be difficult.

We don't embrace any religion, so there's no guide post there for us. And I pretty much detest any kind of "traditional" vows because they are at best trite and at worst anti-feminist.

So where's a modern girl to turn for examples of great vows? Seriously, I'm asking you. All suggestions are welcome!

Getting My Bearings

2009-06-29T17:39:00.000-07:00

I've been putting off dealing with wedding plans lately, mostly out of fear that it might not happen (nothing to do with our relationship!). But one way or another, it's going to happen, and we're quickly approaching the four-months-out date, and I have a ton of things that need to get done. So I'm regrouping, trying to get my bearings and focus on the many little tasks at hand.

Speaking of "bearing," when we first got engaged, I didn't think we would have a ring bearer. I thought we'd have one male attendant, one female, and that would be it. We still have a relatively small wedding party, but it's expended to two men, two women, three girls and one boy. And boy = ring bearer. And ring bearer = adorable pillows!

Heart Felted makes adorable pillows.

For our garden/bohemian wedding, one of these nest pillows would fit in nicely.

The one above is from Mackensley Designs. The one below is from Yandebridal.

And I've never been a super duper DIYer (I try, but I'm by no means at the top of the game), but this DIY pillow from Once Wed is so cute, I just might have to bite the bullet.

A Great Engagement Ring with a Great Story

2009-06-26T18:48:00.000-07:00

I was super excited to learn yesterday that my good friend Laura, who helped me with the layout and header design for this blog, just got engaged! Her engagement ring is so remarkable that I just had to share it.

This gorgeous ring was designed by Bario Neal, a Philadelphia-based designer that makes handcrafted jewelry using reclaimed metals and ethically mined stones, so their work is not only beautiful and creative but eco-friendly.

Laura's super thoughtful fiance had the ring customized to include a diamond that has been in his family for generations and a pearl, because the two of them met through diving. Talk about a non-traditional and completely perfect ring! I can't wait to see how their wedding will come together (and I'm hoping they'll be interested in sharing it on this blog!).

The Joy of Planning

2009-06-24T22:02:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is my birthday. Since it falls on a Thursday, I wasn't planning anything big to celebrate until the weekend. Several weeks back, JT and I decided that we would celebrate by spending the weekend in LA relaxing, eating and shopping. Recently, upon learning that this was how we were going to celebrate my birthday, a friend of mine asked "And you won't do any wedding related stuff, right?"

A month ago, I would have said "exactly." Those wedding related details seemed so daunting, at times even draining to figure out. But given the recent barrage of tragedy, wedding planning has taken on a whole new focus. It's a breath of fresh air, a joy in each day.

At the very beginning of the planning process, I had a bit of a breakdown. I was totally stressed that vendors I had approached were either too expensive or not at all interested in working with us. I began to think that we could never have the type of wedding that we wanted in San Diego (which led me to start this blog). But gradually, things began to fall into place. And with bad news after bad news descending on us in the month of June, wedding planning to a back seat to dealing with overwhelming feelings of sadness and fear. At first, I felt extremely guilty wanting to do anything wedding related. Part of me still does and always will.

But another part of me is grateful for the reminder of why this wedding is important. And for putting into perspective why obsessing about details is not. And for reminding me that wedding planning should be joyous, should be relished and enjoyed, not filled with stress and anxiety and animosity. I truly hope that every bride from here on out will remember that.

I know, I know...my post got a little personal today. I guess that's what birthdays will do to you!

Engagement Shoot Recap

2009-06-23T22:21:00.000-07:00

This weekend, we had our engagement photo shoot with Aaron Thompson. After being submerged in a fog of depression for the last two weeks, it felt pretty great to shake off everything that has been happening, put on cute outfits, and just have a good time together.

We did the shoot in our neighborhood. Not only cool because our neighborhood is just so darn awesome, but also because we 1. felt comfortable and 2. will now have great photos to remember our hood when we eventually move away. Noteworthy highlights of the day included climbing over logs while in a short skirt, laying on the ground in front of our local bar hangout, and getting in a confetti fight. Yup, that last one is gonna look SO cool.

A few tips worth sharing: Anthropologie is your best friend. I wore one of many dresses I have purchased there for the pictures. Just about every time I see an engagement photo with a girl in a super cute outfit, it's from Anthro. Aaron even said that he's just going to send out a link to their website the next time he gets a question from a bride asking what to wear for the engagement photos. Another tip that Aaron endorses is the idea of having a drink (which JT and I did) before the shoot to help loosen up. But the important part is to keep it to ONE drink!

It will be a few weeks before we have the finished products to share with you, but from the couple of shots that Aaron showed us, they are going to look amazing! I can't wait to share his work with everyone! In the meantime, enjoy this photo of Aaron's adorable dog, Barley:

You can also enjoy this photo from an engagement shoot by another set of photographers, He & She Photography. They are based in Orange County and charge very reasonable rates for the gorgeous work that they do, so they would be a great choice for SD brides.

If I Had a Photograph of You

2009-06-21T22:47:00.000-07:00

JT and I are lucky to have the families that we have. Granted, both of our families have really been put through the ringer lately, but seeing how they have been coping with having everyone's world turned upside down just reminds me of what amazing people our families truly are.

From the beginning, we've been trying to find small ways of honoring our families. Neither of us is religious, but we decided to include a reading from Corinthians to pay respect to those members of our family that are still active in the Catholic church. Recently, we decided against having a travel registry in favor of a donation-based Stand Up 2 Cancer registry to honor not only my sister but also the other family members that have battled the disease.

At JT's brother's wedding, he and his wife honored their families by placing family photos throughout the reception. The photos were a wonderful tribute (and it seems a popular one, as suggested in the above real wedding photo by Twin Lens via Style Me Pretty), but we'd like to find a way to honor the family without copying that idea exactly...and so far, I have no ideas. Other than photos, what would be a great way to show those people closest to you how much they mean to you?

I Am a New Tie Wearing

2009-06-17T22:10:00.000-07:00

San Diego is not a necktie-friendly city. When JT started working at an office that required wearing a tie every day, we had to go shopping. And we found...nothing. Seriously. Well, I guess that's not entirely true -- we did find a few ties, but they looked like they should be worn by 45-year-old real estate brokers. Not indie rock, 20-something journalists with good fashion sense.

So where do you turn when you need cool accessories you can't find in your hometown? Etsy, of course.

I bought JT a tie from Cyberoptix TieLab a few Christmases ago, and it became his one (and only) "special occasion" tie. Then he supplemented it with a couple more for the office. I'm loving this one for JT and our two best men on the big day.

Cyberoptix does custom group orders for weddings, too. How perfect!

Trendspotting

2009-06-15T22:26:00.000-07:00

Once again, my originality has totally been called into question. Here I am thinking I'm so unique for coming up with all these cool details, only to see this awesome wedding as shot by Beulah Anne featured on Once Wed:

The crespedia, the mason jars, the hair accessory by Portobello...apparently I'm totally on trend! Or way behind, considering this wedding already occurred and ours is in November.

In the News

2009-06-14T21:23:00.000-07:00

I'm slowly recovering from the mental fog of this week. The crazy thing about timing is that while JT and I have been putting aside a lot of wedding related discussion to focus on what is going on with our families, our wedding plans have been getting much attention online.

I was thrilled to see that our save-the-date cards designed by Inkfancy were featured on Brooklyn Bride this past week!

And I was really touched to see Fight the Fondant discussed on our florist's blog as well.

These little bits of internet appreciation helped with what was a very difficult week, which is why I'm making an effort to return to regular posting more quickly than I thought I would. My posts here are a tiny way of grounding myself each day. I never intended for this blog to be personal*...I meant for it to be a helpful guide for other brides, a demonstration that you can navigate the beach-ceremony-hotel-ballroom-wedding scene that is San Diego in your own unique way.

But over the coming months, you may begin to see more personal aspects creeping in. Particularly about reconciling weddings with difficult family times, trying balance joy and fear, hope and despair. I'll try not to get too off topic and keep up the fun wedding planning tips and stories, but I hope you'll indulge me the occasional philosophical discussion on how to plan a wedding in the midst of pain and turmoil.

Thanks to everyone for the support! More fun things to come soon, I promise.

*If you want to see a truly personal blog about what my family is going through, please visit my sister's blog: bits of myself.

Temporary Hiatus

2009-06-09T17:56:00.000-07:00

Hi friends,

I just wanted to let everyone know that I'm going to be taking a temporary hiatus (I'm guessing at least a week or two) from this blog. Our families need us right now, so I won't have much time for posting.

Thanks for reading...I hope I won't be away for long.

Send Me Your Jars!

2009-06-08T22:28:00.000-07:00

That's right, it's more than a blog post -- it's a call to action. I need to collect as many mason jars as possible for the floral arrangements. I'll continue to troll Ebay, Craigslist, thrift shops and garage sales, but if you happen to be reading this and thinking "hey, I've got a bunch of old jars that I don't need," I'd be happy to put them to good use.

They don't even need to be mason jars, per se. Any cool, old-looking clear glass vessel will do. And it doesn't matter if it has writing on it either, so long as the writing is either in green, brown or yellow. If you happen to have anything to contribute to the cause, please drop me a line!

Feathers Win

2009-06-07T20:27:00.000-07:00

In the great flowers v. feathers debate, feathers have won.

I have ordered a semi-custom made hair piece from Portobello on Etsy. I say "semi" custom because I'm basically asking her to replicate this item that was previously sold in her store but isn't currently:

Because each one is handmade, I'm sure it won't look exactly like this. But that's part of the beauty of it. I'm also very excited about another custom designed accessory that I'm ordering through an Etsy designer...but I'm not going to tell you about it. Like my dress, I'm trying to keep some secrets about my ensemble for the big day!

Cool Photog Coming to San Diego

2009-06-04T22:40:00.000-07:00

Our engagement photo shoot is just around the corner, so I've been spending a lot of time checking out great couple photos for inspiration.

You may have seen Jill Thomas' work on some of the major wedding blogs already (Once Wed and Green Wedding Shoes for starters). But after checking out her website, I noticed one very important fact: she is relocating to San Diego this summer!

Obviously we have already found a photographer that we love (yay, Aaron!), but if you are looking for a cool photog for your event, she seems like a great bet (and reasonable priced, too!).

CAKE!

2009-06-02T22:23:00.000-07:00

That's the name of the bakery that we ended up booking: simply CAKE. We went to a tasting appointment with them over the weekend and were impressed by how the execute the basics of quality cake so flawlessly. We tried four of their most requested flavor combinations -- an almond cake with berries and vanilla cream, an excellently done vanilla and strawberry combo, a decadent chocolate with chocolate mousse and truffle filling, and one of their most popular, the banana truffle.

Their system is that they have several types of cake and several types of fillings that you can mix and match. The cake options include apple and pear spice, cheesecake, espresso, banana, poppyseed, excellent chocolates and vanillas, and more. The filling options include a wide variety of chocolate mousses and truffle, mocha, hazelnut, custards, and fruit fillings. Between all the options, you could create exactly what you want.

We'll probably do some combo of decadent chocolate and a sweet, simple vanilla and fruit (they don't charge any extra to do different flavors on the different tiers!). The banana truffle was delicious, but I'm not sure it compliments our menu.

Design-wise, you know my distaste for fondant, both in taste and appearance. CAKE does amazing buttercream designs. Again, simple, but expertly executed. Ours will feature a clean, art deco-style dot pattern like on this cake:

It will also include some natural elements from our florist as well as our awesome cake topper.

Run Into Flowers*

2009-06-01T17:29:00.000-07:00

We met with Che Bella again this weekend to go over some more details. I love selecting vendors that have an artistic vision, especially when it comes to areas that I know nothing about, like flowers. Our floral landscape will include:

Crespedia

Ladies Mantle

Chocolate Dahlias (I'm told that these are technically black dahlias, but because of the whole murder connection, most florists don't call them that anymore)

Yellow Yarrow

Scabiosa Pods (I had never seen them before, but I LOVE them!)

*Yes, M83's "Run into Flowers" is indeed on our wedding playlist.

A Different Kind of Bridal Show

2009-05-30T16:41:00.000-07:00

Wedding industry shows happen pretty regularly in San Diego. I've never really had much interest in going, because I try to stay away from "typical" vendors. I prefer finding hidden gems. This weekend, San Diego is having yet another installment of the Thread designer trunk showcase. It's basically a giant warehouse set up with trunk shows from lots of indie designers (clothes, jewelry, other accessories). They hipster-up the event with DJs, a bar, and a couple of art installations too.

I'd been once before and remember seeing lots of great, unique accessories, mostly jewelry and handbags, so I thought I'd check it out again specifically looking for wedding hair pieces and jewelry.

I didn't find a whole lot that excited me in the way of jewelry, but I did find a couple of noteworthy designers for hair accessories. The first is Fine Line Accessories.

Her designs incorporate a lot of feathers, so that's always a plus in my book. I saw a few of her designs at Be Beauty in Little Italy as well, and they were pretty darn cute on me.

The next cool designer I found was Rachel Larraine.

Rachel has a lot of funky designs that incorporate tulle for that hint of veil. You can find her designs at a few boutiques in San Diego (including the very chic M Bride in La Jolla), but you can also find her on Etsy.

Che Bella Fiori

2009-05-27T22:08:00.000-07:00

A lot of wedding blogs that I frequently read have a lot of posts that focus on three areas: 1. invitations 2. flowers and 3. accessories. Clearly, I love posting about accessories as well and love finding fun accessory vendors on other blogs. However, when it came to invites and flowers, I didn't need any inspiration. I already knew which vendors I planned on using.

You already know about our invite vendor, but you're probably wondering exactly who this florist is! JT and I knew pretty much from the start that we really wanted to work with Che Bella in Little Italy.

We chose them based on two main reasons. First, for the last five years, JT has been using them any time that he has bought/sent flowers to me for birthdays, anniversaries, etc. For our 5 year (dating*) anniversary, he had a dozen roses delivered to my office, and they were the most beautiful flowers I had ever seen. Ever. Everyone at work was in total awe. In fact, when he proposed, he kicked off the proposal by sending me another small Che Bella arrangement to my office with a card that read "Here's to the start of a great weekend." Little did I know that he would be proposing less than 2 hours later.

Our second reason for choosing them was the fact that Che Bella regularly supplies the floral arrangements for our reception venue, Bleu Boheme. That means that they already have an intimate knowledge of the restaurant's look and feel, and they understand how to complement it. Here's an example of some floral arrangements at the restaurant recently.

Budget florist they are not, but true artists they definitely are. I love hiring folks that I don't have to give much instruction to -- my ideal vendor will take my general ideas about theme and "feel" and run with it, taking care of all the details so that I don't have to think about them. And that's what we will get with Che Bella, which I why I'm really looking forward to working with them!

*Last December, we celebrated our eight year dating anniversary. It seems so funny that after having been together for so many years, we'll be pushing the reset button in November and will be celebrating a one-year anniversary in 2010!

You are Invited

2009-05-24T18:10:00.000-07:00

I was planning on waiting until I actually had them in my hands to post about our save-the-date cards, but I just couldn't contain my excitement any longer. And I know it will spoil the surprise for a few of you who will receive them in the mail, but...

We finalized the design with the fabulous Tere Mendez of Inkfancy earlier this week. How lucky are we that this amazingly talented designer happens to be JT's sister-in-law? I highly recommend her to any other SD brides out there...even if she does live in Seattle!

Mix 'n Match: Yea or Nay?

2009-05-23T16:28:00.000-07:00

By now you may have figured out that I'm not a fan of stereotypical wedding decor. Like round tables of 8 or 10 with one big centerpiece in the middle. We'll be going with the more and more popular long, rectangular tables decorated with a table runner and small groupings of flowers running the length of the table. The question on my mind right now is what all those flowers should be resting in. I mentioned earlier that we are following the farm-like quality of the restaurant by using various sized mason jars for the flowers.

Our florist suggested going even further with the "assorted" look, and incorporating these coffee cans** as well, since they match our color scheme:

A totally cute idea, no doubt. But I wonder if we have the potential to end up looking TOO hodgepodge...I'm starting to wonder if we should stick to all clear glass containers.

These images above via Style Me Pretty show great examples of both -- all clear glass and mix 'n match vessels. What do you think will look best?

**Update: We went to Cost Plus where they sell this coffee, and the cans look much more orange in person than they do in this photo. TOO orange. It's overpowering. So I don't think we'll be going with the coffee can idea after all, and we'll stick with a clear glass palette.

Who's Gonna Drive You Home Tonight?

2009-05-20T17:53:00.001-07:00

If "tonight" means the evening of the wedding, it will be one Mr. Lance Haynes. I hate limos. I've never understood why they have to be so ugly. If I'm gonna shell out my hard earned cash to have someone drive me around, can't it at least be in a cool car?

There are couple of different antique car chauffeur services in San Diego, and they all seem to be about the same price range. This week, we settled on Haynes Chauffeur service. A lot of how we have picked vendors has been based on feeling. How well we jive with them, if they seem to "get" what our wedding is all about and who we are as people. When there are so many vendors out there offering the same thing at (usually) the same price, it's the only way for me that makes sense. And frankly, on my wedding day, I want to be dealing with people that are going to make me feel good and happy.

We'll be going with one of the two cars above, which will pick us up from the ceremony and take us to the reception, then pick us up at the end and take us to our hotel. We've been pretty good about keeping things realistic and not splurging on crazy stuff, but allowing ourselves a couple of cool treats (like this, and our cake topper) has helped keep it from not feeling TOO much like a budget wedding.

2009-05-18T18:16:00.001-07:00

After debating the honeymoon for several months, we've finally decided. Barcelona was a front runner, but after talking with someone who has recently been there, we thought that maybe we wouldn't want to spend the whole week just in Barcelona. So the winner is...

Barcelona and Cannes! We'll begin with 4 nights in Barcelona, soaking up lots of culture and sangria, and then we'll head over to Cannes for three nights of a more chill pace, relaxing seaside. It was surprisingly affordable -- the difference between the three-way ticket and the round-trip ticket to one of the cities was only about $100 more.

JT and I are not big on having a lot of "stuff." We'd much rather spend our money having great experiences traveling and dining than amassing lots of things that will take up space in our home. So when we got engaged, we talked about creating a honeymoon registry (where guests can contribute to your honeymoon through an online account) in addition to a regular registry. I've only known one other person who has done this -- a former coworker used The Big Day for hers, which I contributed to when I attending her wedding. It was a good system, but their fees seem a little high. Another one that seems to be popular is Travelers Joy. Have any of you used one (either as a guest or as a bride/groom)?

Can I get a permanent job taste-testing cakes?

2009-05-17T15:08:00.000-07:00

This weekend has been wedding madness! It started Saturday morning with a trip the the seamstress to find out how much is will cost to get the alterations on my gown done (less than $200 -- not bad!). That was promptly followed by a meeting with a bakery, then a trip to the reception & ceremony sites for some brainstorming, then a meeting with the florist. On Sunday, we tackled honeymoon plans, selected our save-the-dates, found transportation, finished the order on our custom cake topper, and collected all the addresses for our friends and family. Phew!

As you can see, I have much to catch you all up on! Let's start with one of the most fun items: cake tasting.

Our first cake tasting appointment was at Twiggs. I've already shared with you a few of the designs that we saw on their website. After looking through their books again, we also became really partial to this design:

We thought that it would work nicely with our topper. The guys at Twiggs were great, and mentioned that if we got the topper early, they could create a design that would be based off of the details from the topper, since clearly it's an important element for us. But on to the more important issue: taste.

JT's parents joined us for the tasting. Before diving in, JT's dad mentioned that wedding cakes usually look better than they taste. He's right -- they usually do. And that's precisely what I want to avoid.

They brought out a board with small pieces of their 15 different flavors. There were two flavors that stood out to everyone as the best of the bunch: 1. Miss Hazeltine's chocolate (a very simple chocolate cake with chocolate cream cheese frosting that was wonderfully moist) and 2. the "Victorian Wedding" (a white cake with an unusual combination of raspberry and rose water!). I love chocolate, so I'm always inclined to go that way. But the Victorian had such an interesting hint of rose...it was really good as well.

They are already getting pretty booked up for our date, so we are going to have to make a decision soon. But I do feel it will be important to try out some other places too. Next on the agenda: Fab Cakes. Here's a sampling:

I Would Dye for You

2009-05-14T18:18:00.000-07:00

By now you've seen me post a couple of items about colorful shoes that I've found on Zappos and YOOX. Despite my online searching, I have a confession to make: I hate buying anything online if it is going to go on my body. The only exception to this is sometimes jewelry. But clothes and shoes...I really dislike the idea of not being able to try things on. Plus, fabrics and colors often end up looking different in person. I'm super fickle about how things look on me and how they fit, so buying clothing items online usually ends in disappointment for me.

I recently bought a cute, super comfortable pair of black RocketDog ballet flats (at a store, not online). I saw that they had the same pair in a light ivory color and thought "boy, those would look great with my dress."

But I really wanted to embrace the whole colorful shoes thing. Then I came home, found the new issue of Martha Stewart Living in my mailbox, opened up and found this:

A "Good Thing" about dyeing canvas sneakers. So I'm thinking "What if I got the RocketDog shoes in ivory and tried dyeing them marigold?" Sure, they aren't canvas, and they are ivory, not white, but they are also only $30. So if it doesn't work, it would hardly be the end of the world. What do you think? Worth a shot?

Flowers by the Jar

2009-05-13T21:31:00.000-07:00

Given the rustic, bohemian vibe of our reception venue, I'm leaning towards doing very casual flower arrangements, like clusters of hand-gathered flowers in canning jars or vintage glass bottles, like the ones seen below (images from L'amour de Vie Weddings via Style Me Pretty).

I'm also hoping that these types of arrangements will keep the costs low, especially if I can provide the jars. We have our first florist consultation on Saturday, so I'll keep you posted with what I discover.

Been MIA

2009-05-13T21:19:00.000-07:00

I always feel guilty if I go longer than 2 days without posting anything, so I'm sorry. I've been trying to make my way through the 700 images I shot on Sunday and Monday this week. And just to prove I'm not lying, here is a photo from Sunday night's show with the lovely and talented Jenny Owen Youngs:

I've added a couple more shots from her set in my live gallery as well.

The Wedding Website

2009-05-10T12:58:00.000-07:00

So we've officially passed the 6-months-until-the-big-day mark, and I'm starting to feel a little panicked about everything that we have not done. I've been so busy working that we haven't gotten nearly enough wedding tasks done in the last 3 weeks. JT & I are blocking out next weekend as "wedding planning only." Things that need to get done include registering, meeting with the florist, collecting addresses and finalizing the invite list for our Save-the-dates (so that we are ready to mail as soon as they are printed), and many more little things.

One thing that's almost done is our wedding website. I started looking around at all the free wedding website templates back in February, thinking "OK, most of them are cheesy looking and kind of ugly, but I'm sure I can find something that will be decent." Um....wrong. I found absolutely nothing that I actually liked, at least in the "free" realm. I did find some options that, if I was willing to pay $20 or $30, I could customize to make more palatable. But considering I already shell out money for my domain name and my little corner of the internet, I figured why not just piggyback off that and have one of my many, many talented friends help me with the site?

So that's what we did. The lovely and amazing Laura has been hard at work putting together this little beauty for us:

You may recognize Laura's work from this blog -- she also designed the sweet little owl that greets you when you visit. Now we just have to work on getting all the content on the pages.

And in case you are wondering why I just don't provide a link to our website so that you can see it in all its glory, because this is a public blog, I'm not going to be linking to our finished wedding website. I have to keep some things private :)

Unique Hair Accessories from Be Something New

2009-05-08T20:46:00.000-07:00

I am addicted to searching out cool hair accessories on Etsy. I could spend days on there...in fact, I have.

Today's find is Be Something New. Their collection of headbands is absolutely gorgeous. They would be perfect for completing a wedding ensemble, but could also be worked into your everyday wardrobe.

I love the messy structure of the ribbon headband. And marigold colored feathers? You know I'm all over that one.

With many of their items falling in the $25-40 dollar range, the prices can't be beat!

Internet Find: YOOX for Shoes

2009-05-06T22:50:00.001-07:00

We all know about Zappos. Yes, you gotta love that when you order from them, you get your shoes pretty immediately, and you can ship them back for free if they don't work out. But searching for marigold-colored ballet flats on Zappos left me relatively unimpressed. YOOX, however, turned up pages and pages of awesome results, including some by truly noteworthy designers.

Top to bottom: Obeline, RAS, Chloe and Blowfish.

And just to show you how much of a range you can find, the Chloes sell for $230 while the Blowfish pair comes in at a whopping $35.

Internet Find: Tonic Living for Fabrics

2009-05-04T22:04:00.000-07:00

Using large blocks of colorful fabric can be a great way to create a bold decor statement without spending a small fortune. I've been searching for unique fabrics in shades of green, marigold and brown. Making either table runners or a backdrop for a photo booth area are both on my list of possible DIY decor ideas.

Today, I discovered an amazing internet fabric vendor, Tonic Living! Check out some of these gorgeous designs in my color family:

Tonic Living is based in Toronto, Ontario, but don't fear -- they ship internationally. And, they even have a custom sewing service, which included table runners for weddings! How do ya like that?

Gown Secrets: Ordering and Alterations

2009-05-03T20:37:00.000-07:00

OK, believe it or not, my wedding gown in hanging in our guest bedroom as I type this! That's right, I've already got my gown in hand. We haven't registered yet, sent out save-the-dates, or booked our florist, but I have a gown.

So let's take a look at a couple of gown shopping myths. #1: You need to order your gown at least 6 months in advance. While I can't say that this is completely false, it's definitely an exageration. I was under this impression, and clearly, it was not necessary. I started looking pretty much as soon as I knew the "when" and "where" of the wedding, around the beginning of March. I went to a LOT of stores, and tried on probably close to 50 gowns. I know that I am an indecisive shopper, and I knew that simply deciding on which dress would take some time, which it did. It took a good month of shopping to feel like I was comfortable with my decision. But once I placed the order, which was early April, it took about a month from the time I placed my order until the dress arrived at the shop. Obviously, it will vary from designer to designer, but you don't need to feel panicked when you hear/read from "reputable" sources that if you haven't ordered your dress a year in advance, your ruined.

Myth #2: You need to order your dress too big so that it can be altered to fit you perfectly. I think that this myth is the result of bridal salons that have in-house alterations and can get more money out of you by getting you to spend unnecessary amounts on excessive alterations. I had someone in the biz tell me this. When I got measured, they told me that I was one size on the top and a larger size on the bottom (I do not think this is unusual for most women), so I should order the larger size. I said that based on the cut of the dress, I thought the smaller size would work. I asked them to consult with the designer. The designer agreed, the smaller size was ordered, and today, when I tried on the gown, it fit (nearly) like a glove. Yes, I will probably get some minor alterations done to make it fit perfectly, but I could easily wear it as it is now. And the shop that I purchased from actually doesn't do in-house alterations, so they didn't really have anything to gain by putting me in a dress that was too big. Plus, now I can use whomever I want to do the alterations, and hopefully get them done without too much expense.

I have so many pictures of my gown purchasing trips, but I can't show them to you yet because I can't risk JT seeing them on the blog! So you'll all just have to wait patiently until after the wedding for my recap.

DIY sure, but who sets it up?

2009-05-01T17:50:00.000-07:00

My poor blog (and my poor wedding plans!) has been so neglected this past week. Hopefully work will finally calm down next week, and JT and I will be able to buckle down and spend some quality wedding planning time together. Despite the occasional confusions or frustrations, we both are really enjoying this process. Planning a wedding together is really fun.

But on the note of being frustrated and confused...DIY wedding projects. On the on hand, I love the idea of hand crafting decor items so that I can have them exactly they way I want them. Plus, DIY is usually a money saver. I got all jazzed up about DIYing ceremony decorations after seeing this wedding on A Practical Wedding:

How gorgeous are those ribbons? I thought about translating this ribbon tree idea into some kind of branch alter structure, or hanging bunches of these all around the nooks and crannies of the Marston House gardens.

BUT...after I make them all, who hangs them? We can't hang them up the night before - it's a public garden, and we only have it reserved for the morning of ceremony. Who knows how many would fall down or, ahem, "walk off." And obviously I can't put them up that morning because I'll be getting ready. As will my Maid-of-Honor sister and Bridesmaid sister-in-law. Same goes for all the men.

And what about the reception? I love the jars full of flowers that are shown with the table numbers in my previous post, and we could very easily buy jars and loose flowers and fill them, but who sets them up? And who delivers them to the restaurant in the morning? We can't very well ask a small and busy restaurant to hold 200 jars of flowers on a Friday night. Any of you that have DIY'd your wedding and held it somewhere other than your backyard or parents' house but somewhere where you only have a short access window? If so, we'd love your tips!

Recycled Table Numbers

2009-04-28T18:26:00.000-07:00

A couple of weekends ago, JT and I were walking around Little Italy and stopped into one of our favorite stores, Architectural Salvage. Their store is a treasure chest of rescued antique decorative items, from old glass bottles to a giant neon "Casino" sign.

Casually strolling through the store, I got distracted by the bins of old house numbers and thought "these would make the coolest table numbers at the reception!" So we snatched up a bunch, all wonderfully mismatched.

Of course, then I got home and started checking all the wedding blogs I usually read to see if I could find some pictures of any similar ideas. Which I did. I think this has been posted on several wedding blogs, and I'm not sure where the original photo came from, but I found it via Once Wed.

I guess it means that my idea wasn't totally original, but hey, great minds think alike!

Palatable

2009-04-28T18:14:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the absence of posts. Work has been pretty overwhelming lately, and will continue to be for at least the next week. But here's some much needed catching up.

A few weeks back, when trying to plan invitations, our wedding website, fabrics, etc., I realized that I needed to select some "official" colors. As I mentioned in a previous post, our color scheme will be green, chocolate brown, and marigold. But it seemed like a good idea to get some swatches to have a comparison point for everything.

You want to know a great place to find color swatches? Your local home improvement store! My good friend Laura and I ventured over to Home Depot's paint department on our lunch break and picked up dozens of paint chip cards in every shade of green, brown and yellow that we could find!

Looking at all these swatches also got me thinking about all the cool projects you could make with them...maybe paint sample placecards? Not something that I think we'll use, but it sure would be fun for an art-themed wedding.

Ceremony Site: More Marston House Details

2009-04-24T09:13:00.000-07:00

I'm so thrilled with our venues. When my sister was here and we took her to see both of them, it just reinforced how much I love them.

I've seen photos of weddings at the Marston House online, but I thought I'd approach how we lay out our ceremony with a completely blank slate. Since my sister had never seen this place before, she was the perfect person to help us figure out the layout without any preconceived notions.

It happened that on the Saturday afternoon that we went by the garden, a wedding had just finished up. Most people set up their chairs facing this wall, using the fountain-turned-planter as their alter. But this particular wedding was set up to face the canyon.

The wall looks pretty bare right now, but in the Fall it is covered in vines and blooms.

This little structure will be perfect for the string trio to sit under (they request that they be provided with shade during outdoor weddings to protect the instruments. Bet you didn't know that!).

We decided that we will break with the set up patterns we have seen before and face the house. It's such a beautiful backdrop, and again, in the Fall, the flower beds right in front will be nearly 4 feet high with blooms.

One of my favorite hidden features about the Marston House garden is the little "waiting room." OK, it's not really a room...it's a gardener's station, but it's enclosed behind a separate wall, which makes it the ideal place for me to hide while guests are getting settled. Then, the bridal party and I can emerge from this door as we begin our march down the aisle!

Flowers vs. Feathers

2009-04-23T22:38:00.000-07:00

Truthfully, I haven't had any super specific ideas for how I want to do my hair...just sort of vague notions. This is partly because I have enlisted the amazingly talented stylist who cuts my hair to do my hair for the wedding, and I plan on letting her guide me in my hairstyle choices (yes, this is how much I trust her).

So I've been thinking something along the lines of a low, side swept bun. With a super cool accessory of course. At first, I thought for sure I'd just pick a simple but dramatic flower. Like this one from Brenda's Bridal Veils.

But lately, I've been drawn in by all the gorgeous feather hair accessories to be discovered on Etsy. Like this one from Portobello.

And really, when else will I be able to pull off a feathered hair accessory?

But, perhaps my problems have been solved with Velvet Owl! A flower with feathered accents! The yellow matches our color palette wonderfully too, but I'd have to see about swapping out the blue flower for perhaps something green (or more yellow).

Cool Wedding Music, Volume II

2009-04-21T21:26:00.000-07:00

You may recall me posting a few weeks back about a feature that JT and his brother wrote on cool music for weddings. As I mentioned in that post, having good music at our event is pretty much non-negotiable. Every song played will be awesome, because we will choose each and every one and pre-program a playlist. No DJ slipping in "Baby Got Back" anywhere.

The first part of this feature article was written by JT's brother and was posted on Inkfancy's blog. Well, you can now read the article in it's entirety, including section two's list of great first dance songs and a lovely introduction from JT, on Treble.

So, check out some great first dance songs that won't cause you to lose your indie cred, all while enjoying JT's fabulous writing skills. Not that I'm a fan or anything...

Hotel Blocks: Practical or Passe?

2009-04-20T21:41:00.000-07:00

Our project of late has been trying to figure out this whole hotel blocking thing. At first, I thought "arranging a discounted rate at a local hotel for your out of town guests is a lovely and necessary gesture." But then, after a few bad phone calls and a lot of frustrating internet research, I began to wonder...is this a necessity from days past (as in the pre-internet days of travel agents) that has endured as a formality and an "expectation" rather than something that is actually useful to guests?

Here are the problems that I have with blocking hotel rooms. Our friends and family have very different taste in hotels. While our siblings may prefer more luxury or boutique-type hotels, our parents and aunts and uncles may want something more familiar (like a larger chain hotel) and cost effective, especially those that are staying the whole week. On that note, how do we decide which dates to block? I know that my parents will be coming for a whole week, but many of our guests will be more constrained by jobs, school, etc.

And many of our friends who come in from out of town will likely stay with other friends, bypassing the hotel altogether. How can we, especially considering we haven't even sent our invites out, be expected to know exactly what everyone else's travel plans will be? Most hotels seem to expect some kind of guarantee that you will fill all the rooms that you think you will need (again, how are you supposed to know?), and I'd be pretty unhappy having to foot the bill for 4 unused hotel rooms if they didn't get booked.

In my own experiences attending weddings, I have never stayed at the specially selected hotel where rooms were blocked (the only exception being my sister's wedding in Cape Cod). In fact, JT and I recently attended an out of town wedding where we had the option of going through the "block" and staying at a chain hotel close to the venue, but we instead opted to stay at a boutique hotel rather out of the way as a way of having a mini-vacation before and after the wedding. Plus, we got a great deal on the hotel at Hotels.com. We stayed at a luxury hotel for what we would have paid for a Best Western.

Which brings me to my final point...in the days of Hotels.com, Priceline.com, and countless others, how useful is a hotel block anyway? Won't guests have better luck searching online for something that meets their needs as far as location, amenities, and price?

I urge anyone out there reading this to share your thoughts. Have you used blocked hotels when attending a wedding? Have guests at your wedding used the rooms? Did they find it helpful, or did most just do their own planning?