Dress You Up in My Love

Alright, after falling off the blogging bandwagon in November and December due to the wedding, honeymoon, and holidays, I'm back and ready to share more details with you. But rather than tell you about the details, I'll show you. Let's start with some fashion nuggets.

The dress is Nicole Miller, a wonderful designer for brides that are not interested in spending $3,000 on a gown, but still want to look fashion forward.
The shoes are Belle by Sigerson Morrison, amazingly found on sale at Piperlime.
The purse? That's a fantastic find that my sister picked up at a church yard sale! I couldn't believe the luck at how well it matched the shoes. The little broach and ribbon were additions courtesy of Holly Stalder, who made the broach to match the custom shrug I ordered from her, shown below.

The bridesmaids dresses were the ever popular J. Crew. I thought the ladies looked gorgeous! The men wore their own suits with ties from Toybreaker. The flower girls from JT's side of the family wore their own dresses with green sashes made by JT's mom. My niece wore a dress from SweetPlume, and my sister made her own fabulous feather hairband.

The feather hairpiece was made by Portobello -- I got so many compliments on it! And the earrings? Another great random find at Macy's for only $30!

All images by Aaron Thompson.

Turning Lemons Into Lemonade

So you know how everyone has those stories about what went wrong at their wedding? We to do, sort of. There were small things that went wrong on the day-of, but honestly, I didn't even notice most of them (and the ones I did notice, I didn't care about). But there was a last minute planning/design emergency that totally freaked me out. But in the end, it ended up making things even better.

On the Monday before the wedding, my friend Laura and I went to the Marston House around noon (approximately the time that the ceremony would take place on Saturday) to check a few things out. Laura would be helping the rental company set up chairs, tables, etc. on the big day. Plus, I was concerned about the sun -- we had initially planned on facing the house, but I was worried that we might need to adjust based on where the sun would be at that time of day.

And my worries were dead on. Once we got there, I realized that if we faced the house, we'd all be staring directly into the sun. So, last minute change of plans, and we decided to flip the opposite direction and face the fountain. Which meant calling the rental company to adjust the placement of the chairs and coming up with some last minute decorations for the fountain.

I know what you're thinking -- that doesn't sound like a big deal. It wasn't. What was? Because the musicians required a shady spot to sit, I was planning on having them sit under the small roofed structure on the west side of the garden. When we got there that Monday...I saw this:

WTF? A beat-up plastic fence in front of some caution tape? A support pillar about to fall over and crush someone? This was not going to work. Since the property is still technically owned by the city, I know calling them would be useless (when have you ever known the city to fix something non-essential in less than a week?). We rented an umbrella for the musicians to sit under, and began brainstorming options for covering up the deteriorating structure. Some sort of curtain? Attaching swags to the plastic fence that the city put up? Then I found it: the rental company had white lattice panels in their inventory. Three of those covered up the caution tape and plastic fencing perfectly. We chose not to decorate the lattice at all because I figured the less we did to draw attention to it, the less likely it would be that anyone would notice that there was something wrong. And that was exactly the case. I don't think anyone even noticed the panels, let alone that there was something crumbling behind them.

I hope my family doesn't mind me posting this picture of them -- it's the only photo that shows the lattice covering up the damaged structure (in the background). As you can see, it looked just fine.

However, the best part about the last minute changes was the decorations that my sister made for the fountain. From day one, before we even knew the when and where, I was daydreaming of having some sort of hanging floral strings, like these. Upon consulting the florist, we learned that, because it would involve so much labor, these would be really expensive. And I didn't trust my last minute DIY abilities (since you can't make fresh floral elements very far in advance), so I just shelved the idea. But my sister kicked into super-maid-of-honor mode, and after a trip to the wholesale flower shop, she spent the Wednesday before the wedding string these beautiful garlands. We also took some of the leftover flowers and scattered them in the fountain's basin. It look absolutely magical.

Something Delicious

Starting with the cake to recap our reception might seem like an odd place to start, but if you know how much I love sweets, it would make total sense.

There were three vendors that all played a role made our wedding cake the most fabulous confection ever: CAKE, Che Bella, and Jennifer Murphy.

When we first met the team at CAKE, we were sold simply by the fact that the cake tasted great. Why people settle for wedding cake that tastes like cardboard simply because it looks pretty is beyond me. As the name of this blog implies, do not settle for something that looks nice but has no flavor (both literally and figuratively!). The best part about working with CAKE was how a delicious problem had an even more delicious solution. JT and I were having a darn hard time choosing between two flavors -- dark chocolate with hazelnut mousse and dark chocolate truffle filling, and a simply perfect vanilla cake with vanilla creme and fresh raspberries. The solution? CAKE would do both flavors on alternating tiers for no extra charge! People raved about both flavors.

When it came to the appearance and design of the cake, we knew that we wanted a simple, clean design with a touch of whimsy that would show off the true star of the day, our amazing cake topper custom made by Jennifer Murphy. Wondering why we chose a puppy and a bunny for the critters? Here's the slightly embarrassing truth..."puppy" is my nickname for JT, and his for me is "bunny." I know, I know, you can stop making that face now! But words cannot express how absolutely adorable the topper is. It now sits beautifully on our mantel.

CAKE's talented team did a beautiful job with the buttercream frosting (which, by the way, tasted as good as it looked), piping a delicate dot pattern. Che Bella added the touch of whimsy with their flowers. I especially loved the fiddlehead ferns curling along the sides. However, my poor niece had an unpleasant surprise when she picked one up thinking it was chocolate but discovered upon biting down that ferns are not quite as tasty as they look.

Photos by Aaron Thompson

Polaroid Guest Book

I promise I'll have lots and lots of photos by Aaron Thompson to share with you soon, but in the meantime, let's talk about photos of a different kind: our Polaroid guest book.

We didn't want to do the traditional guest book, and photobooths are all the rage on wedding blogs this year, so of course we wanted to incorporate some sort of photobooth concept. What I thought took it up a notch was the way we gave guests the option of adding a personal message in the photo -- Bleu Boheme has a wall across from the bar that's one giant chalkboard. So next to this wall, we set up a small table with a camera, some extra boxes of film and some chalk with instructions to write a message on the chalkboard and snap your photo in front of it. We got some really adorable, sweet and funny photo messages out of it.

Photo by Aaron Thompson

That is until my mom decided halfway through the reception to use up the "leftover" film and went around snapping through a good 30 sheets....and of course, only about half of the guests had actually made their way over to the chalkboard by that point, so a few of them never got to participate in the fun. But every shot, no matter how goofy or strangely composed, is like gold. It was totally worth the high price that I had to shell out buying Polaroid film on Ebay (because Polaroid was officially discountinued this year, it's been selling like hotcakes on Ebay). But fear not, future brides, Fuji is planning on making a replacement product in 2010.

In Which I Publically Vent My Fears

Six weeks this Saturday -- that's how long we have until the big day. With it so close, I'm starting to get overwhelmed by fear. Not of marriage or any of that, but of the many things that could go wrong. My biggest fear was that my sister wouldn't be able to attend my wedding. Now that it seems that won't be the case (thankfully!), my brain is being held hostage by lots of tiny little fears. So in the interest "maybe if I share them, they won't happen," here's my current list of wedding fears:

-No one will come.
-Those who do come won't have a good time.
-The Ipod or PA won't work at the reception.
-The chairs or flowers or cake or whatever won't be set up on time.
-Our wedding party or families won't be ready on time.
-I won't be ready on time.
-We'll forget some small but important detail, like chalk for the chalkboards.
-It will be really hot on the day of the wedding (interestingly, I am less concerned about rain. I find rain to be fun).
-Our "first look" won't get timed right and will be spoiled.
-We won't get the processional cues right with the musicians.
-There won't be enough room to dance at the reception.
-There will be so many pre-wedding activities during the week that by the time Saturday rolls around, I'll be really exhausted.
-I won't be able to properly pack for the honeymoon, because I won't have any time to do laundry and won't have any clean clothes to pack (yes, I'm serious!).

And the biggest one weighing on me right now: my dress, which is already very tight, will not zip up. Or will be so tight that I'll be majorly uncomfortable all day.

There's probably more, but for now, let's deal with the dress. I'm picking it up on Saturday from the seamstress. Think good zipper thoughts for me.

Best. Thing. Ever.

I know I've been doing a little too much complaining lately, as the stress of everything has been pretty overwhelming and I've been feeling, well...overwhelmed. But on Saturday, we came home and opened up a small box containing our custom cake topper from Jennifer Murphy, and suddenly all felt right with the world.

At first, I wasn't going to post this picture, because I wanted everyone at the wedding to be surprised and taken with how cute it is. But it is just too darn cute and made me too happy not to share it right away.

Also, I love working with all the independent artists that I've purchased wedding items from. Jennifer included this adorable and sweet little handmade note in with the topper. It was so touching, and not the first note of this sort that we've received from a vendor. It's so nice to see people who are really connecting with their customers, even when the transactions are taking place across the country through email conversations.

I've got lots more coming up this week: more makeup experiments, a hair trial, invitations in the mail, and much more. So hopefully that means I'll have lots more posts to share with you as well.

Coming into Focus

I'm not a big fan of blog-as-confessional. Generally, I don't think baring your soul on the internet will lead to good things. Just ask that girl from Gawker. But bear with me as this post will be partially personal.

I don't like relinquishing control of anything, and right now, with my sister being sick, there's a major element of my life that I can't control. Both she and I are afraid and worried, and know that it's a possibility that she may not be able to attend the wedding at all, what with planes being major germ incubators. Heck, even a healthy person usually can't set foot on a plane without catching a cold. So needless to say, I'm having a hard time balancing the whole joy about getting married with the worry about my sister. Sometimes it causes me to freak out. So the first part of my blog-as-confessional is to say to anyone who may be or has already been subject to a wedding related freakout, I'm sorry. Just know that I'm trying to cope, and it's not always easy. So if I seem unusually worried about a particular detail, it's just because I'm trying to hold on to whatever it is that I can control.

My whole philosophy as a bride from day one of our engagement was to be the anti-bridezilla. To roll with the punches, not stress on the details, and encourage everyone to just have fun with the whole thing. So descending down this path of stress and worry, I ask myself everyday, "Am I turning into a bridezilla?" My biggest fear is becoming "that" bride, the one that everyone dreads. One of my friends recently shared her thoughts about the whole bridezilla moniker with me. She pointed out that every bride (and groom!), no matter how cool, no matter how grounded, will have moments that freak them out. Stress so bad that it seems to dwarf everything else. And that's OK. Having a momentary freakout is OK, so long as you don't yell at anyone, call them an idiot and make them cry. Which I haven't done, so I think I'm still safe.

Part two of my blog-as-confessional is to a plea to our friends and family that are attending: have a good time. Have a blast. Help me stay true to my original vision of the event. Remember that a wedding is, despite all the emphasis on how it is the "most important" day of our lives, a party. An expensive party, sure, but a party nonetheless. The important part, the marriage, lasts well beyond that day. So along those lines, if you are not able to attend for whatever reason -- you can't get time off work, can't get the kids out of school, it's too much of a financial burden -- that's OK. We understand. And to those of you that can attend and will, we are thrilled and hope to show you a really good time. And I hope that you'll also help remind me of this as well, when I start falling back into the state described above.

So, what will be a part of that really good time? I was hoping that it would include a photo booth. Rather than the traditional guest book, guests would step in front of one of our venues massive chalkboards, write a message to us, stand in front of it, and snap a picture. My initial idea was to have a user-friendly Polaroid 600 camera, so that guests could snap pictures of each other easily. But since the film has been discontinued, it's selling for a lot online, making it too cost prohibitive. My next idea is to use this old-school Laminex camera (pictured above) that I got for free with some Fuji instant film. This camera, however, is NOT user friendly. It's hard to pull the film out of the camera, and then you have to let it sit, peel it apart, and try not to get developer goo on your hands.

We first thought about assigning one of our friends to man the camera, but then didn't want to burden one of our guests by having them be tied to one spot all night instead of enjoying the party. So we're thinking of trying to find someone, a friend of a friend or a student or what have you, that we could bribe with a small sum and a free lunch to do the job. Know anyone that's interested?

Working through the Weekend

What better day to spend Labor Day weekend than, well, laboring. That was pretty much exactly how the last three days have been spent. We knocked out a lot of crafts and tackled a lot on the to-do list. It was pretty darn productive, and frankly, I'm feeling a lot better about what's left to be done. There are still a few big unknowns, but I've got my head around the next 8 weeks pretty well at this point (that's right, we're just shy of hitting the 8-weeks-out mark!)

My friend Laura came over to help me tackle several craft projects, including our escort card tree and flower girl baskets. She and I spent the afternoon cutting, hot gluing, arranging, stringing, and any other craft related verb you can think of. Her keen eye and advanced crafting ability made everything about 100 times better than I could have done alone. Here's the tree she expertly arranged, complete with a little owl that she found for me at Michael's.

I made the leaves. They aren't quite as impressive, but they'll serve as the escort/place cards (whichever you prefer to call them), with the guest's name on one side and their table number on the back.

Next, she set out crafting our flower girl baskets, which look insanely adorable. Plus, with the moss, they perfectly match the ring pillow I made.

The next day, JT and I headed up to his mom's house. There, we went through every single thing on the giant wedding task list, up to the day-of. She amazingly volunteered to take on several projects, which I could not be happier about. There are very few people that I would find more trustworthy than her to help pull off the wedding details.

So while Thanksgiving maybe still be nearly 3 months away, I'm feeling pretty thankful for these wonderful women in my life that are helping me keep it together. Kudos to you, ladies!

License to Wed

Ever wondered what the process is to get a marriage license in San Diego County? Well, I can tell you!

First, you have to call the County Assessor/Recorder/Clerk's office and make an appointment. Walk-ins are not accepted. They only take appointments between 8 a.m. and 4 p.m. Monday through Friday, but we had no trouble getting one for 8 a.m. the next day when I called.

You have to go online to the County's website and download the forms first. When you go to the appointment, you have to bring the completed forms, IDs for both people, and $50 for the fee. Your appointment will go something like this: You'll walk up to the counter, excited, expecting something important to happen. They'll ask you your names, check you off the appointment list, and tell you to take a seat. You'll sit in a gray waiting room, half decorated with white lattice stapled to the wall for that "wedding" look, for 15 minutes.

Then someone will call your names and ask you to take a seat at Window Number X. There, someone will check your IDs, type all of the info from your paperwork into a computer, print it out, have you check it, have a supervisor check it, have you sign on the dotted line, hand over your money, and PRESTO! You now have a marriage license in your hands.

Your wedding must take place and your officiant must complete and return the license has to be completed by your officiant within 90 days of being issued. Regarding the officiant, I learned something interesting in this process. We don't belong to a church, so we didn't want to get married in a church or by a clergy member. So we asked a good friend of ours to officiate. We had known other people who did this, and they had their friends get ordained online (there are several sites that do this -- our friend went through Universal Life Church). However, I discovered that you don't even need to do that. There's a form that you can complete with the County to become a "Deputy Commissioner" for the day, entitling you to perform marriages on that day only. It's just a simple form and a small fee, and any person of your choosing can officiate!

So that's it. Pretty quick and painless. No waiting period, no blood test, just some very light paperwork. It's kind of anticlimactic, the actual process, but seeing that marriage license in your hands is just a little bit thrilling.

She's Crafty*

Let the DIY race officially begin! Last week, I made the ring pillow, based off of this one I found on Once Wed. The problem with me and DIY is that I'm a pretty harsh critic of my own work, so I'm rarely satisfied with anything I make. I think it looks OK...not great, but OK.

I also started our escort card tree, based off of this one that I originally saw on Style Me Pretty.

First, I hit up a major chain craft store for supplies. Then I headed over to San Diego's wholesale flower market, and found the supplies I needed for MUCH cheaper.

This coming weekend, I'll be visiting my mother-in-law-to-be. She generously offered to help me sew the table runners. Here's the fabric we'll be using, nestled alongside the 150 mason jars currently residing in our guest bedroom.

I've also enlisted a friend to make the flower girl baskets, plus there's still the photo booth supplies, guest welcome baskets, and a banner for the rehearsal dinner. And I'm sure I'm forgetting something else...so much to do, so few hours in each day!

*You may be upset to learn that, for the record, I don't really like the Beastie Boys. Sorry.

¡Dios Mio!

Check out this gorgeous shot from our wedding photographer Aaron Thompson. He snapped it at a recent wedding reception at Casa Guadalajara in Old Town's Bazaar del Mundo. How fun does this look?

And just imagine all the fun ways you could play off the setting. Loteria card-inspired invitations (the photo below is of Loteria-inspired table place cards, via Style Me Pretty).

Plus, it'd be a great place to break out this cake topper by Skull Queen. JT and I loved the idea of using this cake topper, back when we were considering this venue as a possible reception site.

They don't post their full catering information online, but based on the prices at the restaurant itself, you could probably have a pretty festive yet cost effective shindig at Casa Guadalajara.

Guest Blog: Bridal Bizarre

Guest Blogger Laura returns with her recap of the San Diego Bridal Bazaar! As a fellow off-the-beaten-path kind of bride, I knew she would be both amused and shocked by some of the wares being paraded, and her summary says it all!

When I heard commercials on the radio for a San Diego Bridal Bazaar at the SD Convention Center, I knew I had to get tickets. The complete list of vendors was listed online, and included chocolate fountains and dove releases. That's right, doves.

Walking into the convention room was quite an experience. Upon entry, a cascade of bubbles showered over you, and you were given a respective "bride" or "groom" name tag to wear. I chose not to wear mine, thereby keeping a bit of mystery as I flitted through the vendors.

To be fair, the Bazaar wasn't all bad. I was very excited with the gift bag I received from the local representative from The Knot. It contained Crest whitestrips, coupons, a microfiber cleaning cloth, and an edition of the Southern California Knot magazine. I also enjoyed the plethora of free cake samples and the San Diego Zoo and Wild Animal Park booth. The zoo was another venue I'd been interested in and it was very cool to just be able to walk up and ask questions instead of emailing back and forth or playing phone-tag.

On the flip side, there were....well....some duds. One part I'd been looking forward to was the fashion show. I was bummed to see more of what I'd seen online at mainstream bridal gown stores. There weren't any dresses that smashed tradition or hinted of innovation. Sequins, ill-fitting busts and miles of taffeta crisscrossed along the runway.

This was one of the few dresses that I thought was at least a bit cool, and it was in the "mother-of-the-bride" section.

Here was another dud. As a modern chick, I cringe when I see images like these where the groom gets dragged off into marital horror. But if you dig the association with being a terrible she-orge, this cake could work.

Details, Deposits, and DIY

With less than four months to go, we are spending a lot of time buckling down on details. I've been flooded with fabric swatches lately -- for the bridesmaids dresses, for the table runners, for the ceremony accessories. Of course no two greens could ever match, right?

Speaking of table runners, that bring me to another point: DIYing stuff. Earlier I posted my concern about DIYing, specifically who can set up all your DIY stuff when you are getting ready. Friends and family have generously stepped forward to handle things. My buddy Laura will be setting up the beverage service at the ceremony (not sure she knows the extent of that yet!). My sister-in-law to-be has offered her help sitting up items at the reception, as has my florist.

One thing that we are not DIYing is setting up the ceremony chairs and tables. When I started getting quotes for the rental items, I asked how much more it would cost to have them set up by each company. The cost was usually minimal, 40 cents per chair, one dollar per table. Oh wait, you want your tables and chairs delivered? Well, that's gonna cost you. Oh, and you want them delivered and picked up at a specific time? That's gonna cost you even more! But ultimately we decided it was worth the couple of hundred dollars to have the piece of mind of not worrying how to schlep 80 chairs down from a rental warehouse the day before the wedding.

What will not be worth the extra cost? Having the table runners sewn for me. The quote that I got was more than three times the cost of the fabric itself, for sewing a very simple item. That one will definitely be DIY, even if my sewing machine isn't that good.

Finally, we just confirmed that we will be having our rehearsal dinner at The Linkery -- yay! I need to get them a deposit check, so I'm off to take care of that now.

Piece by Piece, It All Falls Into Place

We officially have only four months left to go. The little details, like when chairs will be set up at the ceremony site, are starting to become the focus of our attention.

On Monday, a found a woman through Craigslist that had 120 assorted mason jars that was willing to sell them all to me for a low price. They are all different shapes and sizes, and as you can tell, some are very, uh, antique, shall we say. Which will be really cool, once they have been cleaned off, that is.

Going over the schedule for the ceremony, getting my dress altered, finalizing the wording for the invitations...these are all on the upcoming to-do list for me now. Crunch time is going soon, I can feel it.*

*On a pleasant note, JT says that the closer it gets and the more details fall into place, the more exciting and great it feels. And I really love hearing that.

Getting My Bearings

I've been putting off dealing with wedding plans lately, mostly out of fear that it might not happen (nothing to do with our relationship!). But one way or another, it's going to happen, and we're quickly approaching the four-months-out date, and I have a ton of things that need to get done. So I'm regrouping, trying to get my bearings and focus on the many little tasks at hand.

Speaking of "bearing," when we first got engaged, I didn't think we would have a ring bearer. I thought we'd have one male attendant, one female, and that would be it. We still have a relatively small wedding party, but it's expended to two men, two women, three girls and one boy. And boy = ring bearer. And ring bearer = adorable pillows!

Heart Felted makes adorable pillows.

For our garden/bohemian wedding, one of these nest pillows would fit in nicely.

The one above is from Mackensley Designs. The one below is from Yandebridal.

And I've never been a super duper DIYer (I try, but I'm by no means at the top of the game), but this DIY pillow from Once Wed is so cute, I just might have to bite the bullet.

If I Had a Photograph of You

JT and I are lucky to have the families that we have. Granted, both of our families have really been put through the ringer lately, but seeing how they have been coping with having everyone's world turned upside down just reminds me of what amazing people our families truly are.

From the beginning, we've been trying to find small ways of honoring our families. Neither of us is religious, but we decided to include a reading from Corinthians to pay respect to those members of our family that are still active in the Catholic church. Recently, we decided against having a travel registry in favor of a donation-based Stand Up 2 Cancer registry to honor not only my sister but also the other family members that have battled the disease.

At JT's brother's wedding, he and his wife honored their families by placing family photos throughout the reception. The photos were a wonderful tribute (and it seems a popular one, as suggested in the above real wedding photo by Twin Lens via Style Me Pretty), but we'd like to find a way to honor the family without copying that idea exactly...and so far, I have no ideas. Other than photos, what would be a great way to show those people closest to you how much they mean to you?

Trendspotting

Once again, my originality has totally been called into question. Here I am thinking I'm so unique for coming up with all these cool details, only to see this awesome wedding as shot by Beulah Anne featured on Once Wed:

The crespedia, the mason jars, the hair accessory by Portobello...apparently I'm totally on trend! Or way behind, considering this wedding already occurred and ours is in November.

Send Me Your Jars!

That's right, it's more than a blog post -- it's a call to action. I need to collect as many mason jars as possible for the floral arrangements. I'll continue to troll Ebay, Craigslist, thrift shops and garage sales, but if you happen to be reading this and thinking "hey, I've got a bunch of old jars that I don't need," I'd be happy to put them to good use.

They don't even need to be mason jars, per se. Any cool, old-looking clear glass vessel will do. And it doesn't matter if it has writing on it either, so long as the writing is either in green, brown or yellow. If you happen to have anything to contribute to the cause, please drop me a line!

Run Into Flowers*

We met with Che Bella again this weekend to go over some more details. I love selecting vendors that have an artistic vision, especially when it comes to areas that I know nothing about, like flowers. Our floral landscape will include:

Crespedia

Ladies Mantle

Chocolate Dahlias (I'm told that these are technically black dahlias, but because of the whole murder connection, most florists don't call them that anymore)

Yellow Yarrow

Scabiosa Pods (I had never seen them before, but I LOVE them!)

*Yes, M83's "Run into Flowers" is indeed on our wedding playlist.

Who's Gonna Drive You Home Tonight?

If "tonight" means the evening of the wedding, it will be one Mr. Lance Haynes. I hate limos. I've never understood why they have to be so ugly. If I'm gonna shell out my hard earned cash to have someone drive me around, can't it at least be in a cool car?

There are couple of different antique car chauffeur services in San Diego, and they all seem to be about the same price range. This week, we settled on Haynes Chauffeur service. A lot of how we have picked vendors has been based on feeling. How well we jive with them, if they seem to "get" what our wedding is all about and who we are as people. When there are so many vendors out there offering the same thing at (usually) the same price, it's the only way for me that makes sense. And frankly, on my wedding day, I want to be dealing with people that are going to make me feel good and happy.

We'll be going with one of the two cars above, which will pick us up from the ceremony and take us to the reception, then pick us up at the end and take us to our hotel. We've been pretty good about keeping things realistic and not splurging on crazy stuff, but allowing ourselves a couple of cool treats (like this, and our cake topper) has helped keep it from not feeling TOO much like a budget wedding.